Sugar is a sometimes food as PP said above. I wouldn’t say “I am on a diet I want to make myself skinnier, or I am fat etc..” but I am totally fine telling my kids “ I am not hungry for sweets”, “I don’t like eating sweets every day, I don’t think it is good for you to do so”, “sure have a piece of cake, you are a growing kid, you can enjoy a treat. I am fine, I am all grown up and I don’t need a treat every day”.

Maybe that sounds restrictive to you but to me it models moderation and control (I also eat healthy portions of good food, I do not go on restrictive diets in front of my kids)

Just tell your kids that your body does not do well when you eat sugar. Or be honest - explain that when you eat it you eat too much. My husband is like that. That way you are showing them you are making a healthy decision for you. And not making them feel like sugar is evil. I think it also helps them understand that sugar is a sometimes food.

I really do not think this is a big deal at all. A lot of adults limit their sugar.

“She has autism, which leads to challenging moments; what’s your excuse?”

I try to always “participate” in desserts and treats, so as not to model all-or-nothing behaviors for my kids. So if my oldest daughter makes a cake for dessert, I’m having a small slice. I don’t always finish it, but I participate. I don’t go around taking things I don’t really want, but I never want my kids to avoid desserts or the occasional soda at the movie theater. (They don’t need to know that I only took five sips of my soda.)

It’s fine to say you’re not in the mood for sweets, or you’re too full, or you’d prefer something else or whatever. What’s healthy for kids is helping them develop and listen to their body’s signals about food: hunger, fullness, preferences, etc. One of my three kids doesn’t like sweets that much; while his siblings are devouring their cupcakes and asking for another, he takes a bite of his and says he doesn’t want the rest. (He’d ask for a second bag of chips, mind you). It’s fine.

Health-wise, I find it useful to pay more attention to added sugar in things like ketchup, bread, salad dressing - where someone wouldn’t expect it - for the sake of my kids’ health. Eating a lot of added sugar in things that aren’t thought of as “sweet” can be problematic.

It sounds like you're doing things the right way, OP. I've known so many moms who are restricting food for themselves and just simply remove it from the house completely and expect their kids to eat like them. It's none of my business, but I wonder if they are teaching their kids to demonize every food that's not a fruit or a vegetable (Actually, I know parents who barely let their kids have fruit).

Of course no one "needs" sweets, but we all have our biases - I was raised in the 80s and we had a glorious supply of junk food at all times - no one ended up with any weight or health issues as a result of it and I feel that my siblings had a healthy relationship with food. (I ended up with an eating disorder but that was unrelated to me having access to Pop Tarts)

So when I had kids at home, I kept sweets and junk in the house even though I ended up with stress-induced binge eating of sweets during my daughter's teen years. You say that you were eating a dessert on a nightly basis. That does not really sounds like you had a huge problem with sugar but only you know what's going on in your head and in your body. I was doing things like having daily "breakfast dessert" and "lunch dessert" and I gained about 30 pounds over the course of maybe 6 years (up to 160). If I had just had one sweet per day, I would not have felt out of control or gained any excess weight.

f you are able to have it in the house and just decline without making a show of it, that's great. I personally waited for an empty nest, finally committed to cutting out the sugar then, kept it out of the house and dropped 40+ pounds in about 7 months and have kept it off for two years and feel great.

You’re fine, OP. My mom just straight up doesn’t like sugar very much so she only very rarely has dessert with the family. Sometimes she’d have herbal tea to be social, or a very small piece of cake but it was never an issue that she mostly abstained. BIL is like this too so now they often share coffee for holiday meals (they’re also the only two in the family who like coffee). My dad adores sweets so we had (often very sugary) desserts every night. My sisters and I all grew up healthy with a totally normal relationship with food/sugar. Eat what makes you feel good and don’t be overly restrictive with your kids and it’ll be fine.

One thing I would suggest is finding something (doesn’t have to be food) that you can treat yourself with so they can see you indulging and enjoying yourself and know that you think it’s fine to do things that make you happy, sugar just isn’t necessarily that thing for you.

You’ve exactly described what I do - when my kids ask if I want something I just say I’m full or not hungry or whatever. I do make an exception for their birthdays, but sugar is an addiction for me and I can’t have just a bite here and there to do the “everything in moderation” style of eating. So far my kids seem to barely notice if at all.

I recently stopped eating sugar treats (ice cream, chocolate, candy, cookies, cake) but not really worried about added sugar in say ketchup or fruit. I have an addictive personality (in recovery for drugs) and was devouring sugar treat every night. It’s been about 6 weeks and I lost 5 lbs with no other changes. I’m an all or nothing person, so it’s easier to say nothing than allow for treats for special occasions. I have a full life and if I allowed on special occasions I would still be having it weekly or multiple times a week. I’m happy with this choice and I don’t think obsessed. However, I want my kids to grow up with a healthy sense of moderation. I’ve read others who food restrict discuss how it affects their kids. I don’t make comments about not eating it to them, just have avoided or said I’m not interested if offered in front of them.

Is there a way to continue this without creating any unintended side effects in my kids?