Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My family is in Australia, DH is deployed. I see my family once a year when they fly here for a month. We enjoy our time together; they are involved grandparents even from afar. ILs live one hour flight away and are not involved albeit "send us the pictures".

Just let this die already! Your kids are your responsibility not your in laws. They don’t want to be bothered if you need help hire help. They’re not obligated to take an hour flight to come help you!!

Not PP but this is awful harsh

There’s nothing harsh about the truth.

Your truth.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My family is in Australia, DH is deployed. I see my family once a year when they fly here for a month. We enjoy our time together; they are involved grandparents even from afar. ILs live one hour flight away and are not involved albeit "send us the pictures".

Just let this die already! Your kids are your responsibility not your in laws. They don’t want to be bothered if you need help hire help. They’re not obligated to take an hour flight to come help you!!

Not PP but this is awful harsh

There’s nothing harsh about the truth.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My family is in Australia, DH is deployed. I see my family once a year when they fly here for a month. We enjoy our time together; they are involved grandparents even from afar. ILs live one hour flight away and are not involved albeit "send us the pictures".

Just let this die already! Your kids are your responsibility not your in laws. They don’t want to be bothered if you need help hire help. They’re not obligated to take an hour flight to come help you!!

Not PP but this is awful harsh

Anonymous wrote:My family is in Australia, DH is deployed. I see my family once a year when they fly here for a month. We enjoy our time together; they are involved grandparents even from afar. ILs live one hour flight away and are not involved albeit "send us the pictures".

Just let this die already! Your kids are your responsibility not your in laws. They don’t want to be bothered if you need help hire help. They’re not obligated to take an hour flight to come help you!!

Anonymous wrote:My family is in Australia, DH is deployed. I see my family once a year when they fly here for a month. We enjoy our time together; they are involved grandparents even from afar. ILs live one hour flight away and are not involved albeit "send us the pictures".

Does the military not have a lot of built in supports? Other parents? Resources?

My family is in Australia, DH is deployed. I see my family once a year when they fly here for a month. We enjoy our time together; they are involved grandparents even from afar. ILs live one hour flight away and are not involved albeit "send us the pictures".

No, our families are not particularly helpful/involved so we gravitated ourselves to the overseas lifestyle because it was more family friendly/easier to find a sense of community.

My family are all in England. Spouses family are 15 mins away and 25 mins away. The ones 25 mins away have no kids and are my kids Aunts. They spend no time with DD, don’t take her out anywhere, nothing. I think that have babysat when we asked ( for work conflicts) less then 5 times and DD is 10. So no I’m not jealous. Everyone has a different situation, ours is what it is and we work with it.

^ clarifying that all our parents, siblings, etc are in our home country. I have a distant cousin here, who we see occasionally.

No! We've moved partly to get away from them

I mean, of course, I miss having relatives nearby whom I trust and get along with. And I love my parents enough that I worry about their decline in a far-off land without me. It would be great if they could live a day trip away. Far enough that they couldn't pop in anytime, but near enough that I don't have to get on a red-eye and cross several time zones to visit.

We were the overseas family with everyone back in the US. We are back now, but I was insanely envious of folks with helpful, nearby family and a solid network. It was just us, so we just figured it out as we went along.

For every instance of someone having fabulous family, there are the folks who have mean, petty, interfering jerks nearby making their lives harder than they need to be. There’s always an upside, but sometimes it’s hard to find.

My family isn't overseas, but I have no relationship with my parents, and DH's parents are on the opposite coast. I am not jealous of people, because I know you never know the whole story. We have a great relationship with my in-laws. They're really great people.

We get by with a great nanny, a couple of babysitters and friends who can be emergency backup when the nanny is sick or on vacation.

Only part of my family is overseas, but DH is in the military, so we're not near anyone else. It sucks. Logistics are difficult. Not sure what else to say.

My family is overseas. They weren't helpful with our babies / toddlers when we were there, so it was a relief to get away from them. We had no help in either place and learned fast how to be self-sufficient.

Are you jealous of people who have family close by, especially if they are helpful (with your kids - when they were young, or if they are now young)?

Are your in laws loving/warm/helpful?

How did you get by when things are tough (ie: support or babysitting, etc.)?