My ex has a diagnosed Cluster B personality disorder and was determined to fight, torture me and bankrupt us through litigation (after he cheated on me and he filed first) because he was angry I wouldn’t stay with him. I borrowed over $100,000 and will be paying it back for awhile. I also took a major financial hit but the price of freedom was worth it.

Anonymous wrote:We didn’t use a lawyer. We filled out the paperwork ourselves.

I refinanced the house and gave him 1/2 the equity.

No alimony, I kept my retirement/he kept his.

No moving expenses but he bought new furniture.

This was me too. $84 to file and a little more for copies of the decree. We decided everything ourselves and did the paperwork ourselves. He moved out, I refinanced and bought out his equity with other assets I traded him for. We kept our own retirement accounts.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How much money should I anticipate spending in a divorce? 44F, no kids.

Attorney’s fees?
Cost to sell house?
Moving costs?

What other expenses should I consider?

There are some minimal court filing fees, usually $100-$200 or so.

If you have to split a pension or some future retirement benefits there can be a cost for an attorney to prepare the proper Qualifying Domestic Relations Order, or QDRO.

Mostly the biggest costs come long term from losing a double income to support just one household. And from child support or alimony. If you don’t have those things and don’t have complicated finances, shouldn’t be too bad.

In what kind of situation would someone have to split their future pension???

This is common. Ex-spouse gets 50 percent of the portion of the pension earned during the marriage, to be paid out directly by the pension fund if and when the first spouse becomes eligible.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How much money should I anticipate spending in a divorce? 44F, no kids.

Attorney’s fees?
Cost to sell house?
Moving costs?

What other expenses should I consider?

There are some minimal court filing fees, usually $100-$200 or so.

If you have to split a pension or some future retirement benefits there can be a cost for an attorney to prepare the proper Qualifying Domestic Relations Order, or QDRO.

Mostly the biggest costs come long term from losing a double income to support just one household. And from child support or alimony. If you don’t have those things and don’t have complicated finances, shouldn’t be too bad.

In what kind of situation would someone have to split their future pension???

Anonymous wrote:How much money should I anticipate spending in a divorce? 44F, no kids.

Attorney’s fees?
Cost to sell house?
Moving costs?

What other expenses should I consider?

There are some minimal court filing fees, usually $100-$200 or so.

If you have to split a pension or some future retirement benefits there can be a cost for an attorney to prepare the proper Qualifying Domestic Relations Order, or QDRO.

Mostly the biggest costs come long term from losing a double income to support just one household. And from child support or alimony. If you don’t have those things and don’t have complicated finances, shouldn’t be too bad.

It really depends if you two can agree or not. I think I spent around $2500. Worth every penny. Used an arbitrator then an attorney to file papers. Ex didn’t even have a lawyer.

We didn’t use a lawyer. We filled out the paperwork ourselves.

I refinanced the house and gave him 1/2 the equity.

No alimony, I kept my retirement/he kept his.

No moving expenses but he bought new furniture.

Do you expect conflict?

Otherwise, it shouldn’t cost more than a few thousand if you choose collaborative divorce, don’t fight over household appliances, and generally have realistic expectations about starting over in a new home.

My cousin just got divorced this way and spent $3k in Queens. She’s moved back to MD temporarily, but all of the legal stuff was in NY.

Contentious or not? Attorney could be as little as $5,000 if not contentious.

Moving cost depends on how much stuff and how far you are going. Downsizing cost me $4,500 but I was also the last one out of the marital house so kind of got stuck emptying it out, so it took longer.

Transactional cost of selling the marital house depends on its value and your jurisdiction. But figure around 7-8% of value including real estate commission.

Realistically 5-10% of your joint assets

How much money should I anticipate spending in a divorce? 44F, no kids.

Attorney’s fees?
Cost to sell house?
Moving costs?

What other expenses should I consider?