Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is it hurting you? No? Then who cares.

People are criminally offended when women actually like and value themselves. You never see equivalent threads about why women have such low self-esteem.

I see a problem with with the idea that looking younger, men hitting on them, etc. means these women like and value themselves. It equates a woman's worth with male attention and looking young. I get it, I'm 39 and have an extensive anti-aging skincare routine, but the whole thing is messed up.

How is it messed up? What’s wrong with them having fun and feeling attractive?

This board is exhausting.

I don't actually doubt that people have mistaken them for much younger and that they get attention from younger men. Some people, particularly if they are of a different race, are bad at guessing age, and some men will just f*** anybody.

I wonder if some of it is feeling like you look the same because you’ve been in your skin the whole time and the change is gradual. For me, I have an incredibly hard time guessing age in general and I feel like I look “the same” as I did 10 years ago. Logically, I know that’s not the case and I do look my age so I know it’s not correct but I still feel the same, you know?

My mom is in her 50s and constantly commenting on this. I feel pressured to agree when I don’t. People just cannot see their own aging!

And I know next people are going to say “well maybe white women” but no. All races of women look their age. No one mistakes one of my south Asian aunts for a cousin.

Anonymous wrote:Is it hurting you? No? Then who cares.

People are criminally offended when women actually like and value themselves. You never see equivalent threads about why women have such low self-esteem.

I see a problem with with the idea that looking younger, men hitting on them, etc. means these women like and value themselves. It equates a woman's worth with male attention and looking young. I get it, I'm 39 and have an extensive anti-aging skincare routine, but the whole thing is messed up.

I think you can dress however you want at any age. I hate people making comments like "after 40 you can't wear mini skirts" or some garbage like that.

So while these women are factually wrong, perhaps it comes from a need to rebel against the perception that they should all wear mumus at their age, and behave like gentle grandmothers.

I’m over 50 and while I don’t look my true age, there is no mistaking me for anyone in their 30’s and certainly not in their 20’s. Maybe it makes them feel better to think people see them the way they still see themselves. I may not feel my age but I’m not kidding myself thinking people see me as young.

I don't pretend I look like I'm in my 20s or 30s. But I could probably pass for early 40s. I'm 52.

We'll see how you feel when you are in your 50s. You might claim you look like you are 41.

Come on ladies, let us be! I found my best self at 50 and have never had a healthier (if delusional, so be it) self esteem. I love my life and have never felt better about myself. I’ happy to my core! The difference between 25 and 50 is . . . I truly don’t give a flying eff what other people think and I surround myself with friends who make each other feel terrific about themselves. Ah youth, it’s truly wasted on the young.

Anonymous wrote:Yes, I've noticed similar in that age bracket.

+1

Insecurity, but they think they have "healthy" self esteem. When someone is so far off the mark, it borders on mental illness.

Is it hurting you? No? Then who cares.

People are criminally offended when women actually like and value themselves. You never see equivalent threads about why women have such low self-esteem.

Anonymous wrote:Some have really hood self esteem. Is that a crime? Im 46 and look maybe 10 years younger, except when my grays show.

Delusional, is more like it. What else are you delusional about?

Some have really hood self esteem. Is that a crime? Im 46 and look maybe 10 years younger, except when my grays show.

Yes, I've noticed similar in that age bracket.

I recently had dinner with relatives, all females in their early 50s. All the women look their ages (and one looks slightly older). During the dinner, all of the women (with straight faces) kept commenting on how young they looked, how people mistake them for 20/30 somethings, how young guys hit on them constantly, etc. I was baffled by the delusion but tried hard not to show it.

Serious question, but what's behind that level of deluding? Is it fear of reality, getting older, being competitive, and is there any point in disagreeing with them when they aren't hurting anyone? Also, what is so wrong with looking good for your age?

I am the youngest in the group at 41, and while I take excellent care of myself, I look my age.