We buy it as gifts only, otherwise they pay themselves. We talk to them about paying for labels, etc., but if that’s what they want for Christmas and they understand they will receive fewer presents of one is very expensive, then we will consider it.

Nope, not even as gifts if it's that expensive. Not at this age.

My kids lose things or they will outgrow it in a year. That's a throwaway item.

I don't even buy myself expensive shoes or clothing.

I save a lot for their college. Now, that's an investment.
Thank goodness we don't live in this type of area.

It is so crazy to me how expensive, luxury items have become the norm among many teenagers these days. I’m old—I went to college in the 90s with lots of very wealthy kids and no one really had super expensive clothes or accessories, or if they did, you wouldn’t have been able to tell. The conspicuous consumption is just out of hand, at least in some areas/schools.

I have bought extremely expensive things for my children, but they're in the realm of useful/artistic/investment pieces, not consumables.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the problem is the private school. Really think about the values she's learning there.

We had the exact opposite situation.

My kids attended a very wealthy public school pyramid in Arlington and kids were wearing $1,000.00 sneakers and all kinds of high end clothes.

They are now in a private Catholic HS in DC and it's been great for my youngest (9th) who got so caught up in coveting and wanting all the excessive things his friends were getting. Having to wear khakis a collared shirt and boat shoes like every singe boy in the school has been the BEST thing ever for us. It also broke him of the greed.

My kids went through/are in a private Catholic HS (small in Maryland) and it didn't do much to break them of wanting the expensive popular clothing and shoes. I guess at least they didn't want the same quantities since they only have an out-of-uniform day every once in a while, but my DD still wants those ridiculous Golden Goose shoes (not happening), and my son still wanted whatever was popular when he was in HS.

Anonymous wrote:Can you tell me when it starts? I have a 1st grade girl at a K-8. They wear uniforms, but on free dress days the older girls dress like they pulled clothes on from the bottom of their soccer bags. This is a private jet kind of place and I was treated to views of ski houses across the mountain west during pandemic virtual classes, so I’m wondering if the clothing thing comes later or if I’ve successfully lucked into a school that doesn’t care about pricey fashion.

A lot of the really wealthy kids are like that. At least the ones from older wealth--which is not usually what's at the flashy big 3s where everyone is so status conscious and conscious of what car they drive like on this forum.

I think the values at some of the religious schools also go against that extensive greed and waste and more about service and giving back.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the problem is the private school. Really think about the values she's learning there.

We had the exact opposite situation.

My kids attended a very wealthy public school pyramid in Arlington and kids were wearing $1,000.00 sneakers and all kinds of high end clothes.

They are now in a private Catholic HS in DC and it's been great for my youngest (9th) who got so caught up in coveting and wanting all the excessive things his friends were getting. Having to wear khakis a collared shirt and boat shoes like every singe boy in the school has been the BEST thing ever for us. It also broke him of the greed.

Oh--and there are some very, very wealthy families at the school but the great equalizer is all of them having to wear the same basic 'approved' attire to school. And HS boys don't wear coats so they aren't coveting those either. lol

Can you tell me when it starts? I have a 1st grade girl at a K-8. They wear uniforms, but on free dress days the older girls dress like they pulled clothes on from the bottom of their soccer bags. This is a private jet kind of place and I was treated to views of ski houses across the mountain west during pandemic virtual classes, so I’m wondering if the clothing thing comes later or if I’ve successfully lucked into a school that doesn’t care about pricey fashion.

Anonymous wrote:I think the problem is the private school. Really think about the values she's learning there.

We had the exact opposite situation.

My kids attended a very wealthy public school pyramid in Arlington and kids were wearing $1,000.00 sneakers and all kinds of high end clothes.

They are now in a private Catholic HS in DC and it's been great for my youngest (9th) who got so caught up in coveting and wanting all the excessive things his friends were getting. Having to wear khakis a collared shirt and boat shoes like every singe boy in the school has been the BEST thing ever for us. It also broke him of the greed.

Have you kid work to earn the money for the items.

We just say that’s not how we choose to spend our money, plain & simple.

My niece is in private with kids whose families have private jets, etc.; it blows my mind, really. She has a lot of this influence, but is a FA student with the rest paid by grandparents. For Christmases and birthdays, she asks for gift cards and then combines them to buy herself something that feels in line with her classmates. It’s impressive to see how she has learned early to go with classic items vs trendy bits.

My kids rarely ask for anything expensive (and never as expensive as OP’s daughter). I buy it for gifts and make sure they have sufficient allowance to save for things I won’t buy. In the end, they rarely buy the items I won’t.

We're not at private school but are in Bethesda so the pressure is still all around us. I'm not someone who will spend money on brands and we've always talked about the value of money, saving, etc. etc. One son (14 yrs old) wants $150 sweat pants (bc there's a logo on them of course).

If he wants it, he has to pay for it. I think that's the only way they'll really understand money -- how many lawns needs to be mowed, chores, lawns raked, etc. to get one pair of sweat pants....

I think the problem is the private school. Really think about the values she's learning there.

We can afford it. But I won’t buy it except for birthday gifts. There’s no good reason to have something expensive when you’re just going to grow out of it. Expensive items should be investment pieces.

I just cannot justify aviator nation, love shack fancy, golden gooses etc… for my fourteen year old.

I understand it is what is trendy right now, but, things this expensive were never trendy when my older daughters were in HS.

Many of her friends are decked out in these expensive items and more… she has a few she has payed for for herself or gotten as a gift.

Maybe it is because I did not grow up with any ability to afford nice things, but how do you justify it for your kids? Teens wearing $300 skirts…

We are lucky to be able to afford it, and I see it everywhere at her dc private school, but can’t get on board with the concept.

Interested in others pov.