I have an 8th grader so this will be us next year ....

I am surprised people won't let their kids hang out after the dance - seems to be a group of 9th graders could hang out at someone's house after the dance (which ends at what, 10 pm?) until midnight. Parents home, of course. This seems pretty harmless to me.

I have a freshmen and would say no.

So far, we like to know who the other guests are. Names and address. If we have never met the parent, we don't allow it.
Ask me again in a year when my son might be interested in homecoming. I think we will still be this way. We are strict in some things and very lose in other things.
But, when it comes to gather at people's house AFTER dark, we think twice. Bad things tend to happen after dark.
If they gather in a public area, we allow it but remind him, to be on proper behavior. I said, I don't want to see a picture or video of you and your friends doing stupid stuff on Nextdoor.

Depends on the kids/parents. DS is going to homecoming with a bunch of kids that he (and we) have known for 8 years. And I would be fine with him going to any of their houses after (and yes, I would still probably text the parents...just because we text all the time anyway and I would offer to bring something.)

DD is going with a bunch of kids from school that I don't know. So, no, I would not be comfortable with her going to someone's house that I didn't know.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Speak to the parents. Have an early curfew. Do not let them "sleepover" as that's probably a ruse re: where they will really be or who they will be with. Do not let them be driven by another teen -- you do it. 14 is young. I wouldn't be keen on this if students there were older. One grade level, maybe. Not 2 grade levels.

+1,000. Also agree with last PP that you need to very specifically ask about alcohol and if they'll be providing some oversight or will they simply be physically in the house but upstairs asleep or otherwise not supervising or checking in on the party. Do you know your DC's friends' parents? Maybe coordinate with them, too.

Agree. I have a freshman and may allow some specific get-togethers after the dance, with these types of parameters. I would also like to know how big of a gathering. Shifty plans or answers, no go.

I would let him go for a couple of hours but I'm driving him! Pick up no later than midnight.

I have a freshman and I would not.

Anonymous wrote:Speak to the parents. Have an early curfew. Do not let them "sleepover" as that's probably a ruse re: where they will really be or who they will be with. Do not let them be driven by another teen -- you do it. 14 is young. I wouldn't be keen on this if students there were older. One grade level, maybe. Not 2 grade levels.

+1,000. Also agree with last PP that you need to very specifically ask about alcohol and if they'll be providing some oversight or will they simply be physically in the house but upstairs asleep or otherwise not supervising or checking in on the party. Do you know your DC's friends' parents? Maybe coordinate with them, too.

Talk to the parents who will be hosting the after party about what their rules about alcohol are. I know a few parents who don’t only ok drinking at 14, but supply the alcohol.

Speak to the parents. Have an early curfew. Do not let them "sleepover" as that's probably a ruse re: where they will really be or who they will be with. Do not let them be driven by another teen -- you do it. 14 is young. I wouldn't be keen on this if students there were older. One grade level, maybe. Not 2 grade levels.

No, unless I spoke to the parents beforehand.

Depends. Is it all freshmen or are there older kids at this party? Has your kid confirmed the parents will be home? Definitely no sleepovers, I would want to see them afterwards.

Would you let your 14 year old freshman go to a homecoming afterparty? As background, our school isn't having a dance and a large group of kids are going out to dinner instead and there may be an afterparty at someone's house. And if you do let them, do you call the parents of the house beforehand? New to all this...