Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I only have young kids but I had to take this off of my very overwhelming to do list. We appreciate gifts and the people who give them. I send a text with a photo of my kid using the gift when I can, the rest I just let it go. Apologies in advance to anyone who is offended. I can't do it all.

This. I would gladly even take gift giving off the table to save me the headache of having people offended. We don't mean to offend. If your intention in giving the gift is to be thanked, you can probably abstain.

What if we thank you in person when we receive the gift? Is that not good enough?

People have always been busy. It’s common courtesy to send a thank you note once you’ve had a chance to open the gift. Thanking someone for something when it’s wrapped and you don’t know what it is doesn’t count.

My mom always had my sister and me write thank you notes. I do the same thing with my daughter. In my view, it’s important to take the time to show gratitude.

No, people have NOT been busy like they are now. Not anywhere close.
And we no longer use mail. At all. Thank you notes are definitely a relic of a bygone era that only older people utilize.

And if me thanking you to your face and telling you how nice it is to give a gift "doesn't count" then you are too high maintenance to know.

You’re rude and I hope I don’t know you in real life.

Dude, I thank people to their face for gifts and you tell me that's NOT SUFFICIENT! That is the most arrogant thing ever. If I thank you in person, it shouldn't need a post-facto redo. My thanks do not change once gift opened.
Name anyone under 50 who uses USPS and/or letters.

You need to get off your high horse. And no, I am 100% sure that I do not know you in real life. Most of my friends are pretty chill people.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I only have young kids but I had to take this off of my very overwhelming to do list. We appreciate gifts and the people who give them. I send a text with a photo of my kid using the gift when I can, the rest I just let it go. Apologies in advance to anyone who is offended. I can't do it all.

This. I would gladly even take gift giving off the table to save me the headache of having people offended. We don't mean to offend. If your intention in giving the gift is to be thanked, you can probably abstain.

What if we thank you in person when we receive the gift? Is that not good enough?

People have always been busy. It’s common courtesy to send a thank you note once you’ve had a chance to open the gift. Thanking someone for something when it’s wrapped and you don’t know what it is doesn’t count.

My mom always had my sister and me write thank you notes. I do the same thing with my daughter. In my view, it’s important to take the time to show gratitude.

No, people have NOT been busy like they are now. Not anywhere close.
And we no longer use mail. At all. Thank you notes are definitely a relic of a bygone era that only older people utilize.

And if me thanking you to your face and telling you how nice it is to give a gift "doesn't count" then you are too high maintenance to know.

You’re rude and I hope I don’t know you in real life.

Some do, some don't. Some people suggest that wanting to be thanked for a gift means you have some ulterior motive or are just giving the gift for selfish reasons, which I find silly. If you didn't give the gift in person (in which case, the teen should have thanked you in person), it's common (or uncommon) courtesy for the recipient to let the giver know that (1) the gift was, in fact, received (and not lost or misdelivered), and (2) appreciated. A formal note is not required for most occasions; an informal communication is fine. Some people resent any sense that they have any obligation to thank someone for a gift; some people downgrade the obligation as "formulaic" or "rote" or otherwise silly and meaningless; some people think that they are so uniquely busy that they are excused from this basic obligation; some recognize that it's nice to thank someone who gave you a gift and send a text, email, or notecard, or make a phone call.

My kids send notes. I send notes. Generally, I think it's about a 50/50 chance you will receive a note when you do something nice/send a gift to somebody. Parents telling their kids that it's not worth the effort to express gratitude are not very good parents imo.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I only have young kids but I had to take this off of my very overwhelming to do list. We appreciate gifts and the people who give them. I send a text with a photo of my kid using the gift when I can, the rest I just let it go. Apologies in advance to anyone who is offended. I can't do it all.

This. I would gladly even take gift giving off the table to save me the headache of having people offended. We don't mean to offend. If your intention in giving the gift is to be thanked, you can probably abstain.

What if we thank you in person when we receive the gift? Is that not good enough?

People have always been busy. It’s common courtesy to send a thank you note once you’ve had a chance to open the gift. Thanking someone for something when it’s wrapped and you don’t know what it is doesn’t count.

My mom always had my sister and me write thank you notes. I do the same thing with my daughter. In my view, it’s important to take the time to show gratitude.

No, people have NOT been busy like they are now. Not anywhere close.
And we no longer use mail. At all. Thank you notes are definitely a relic of a bygone era that only older people utilize.

And if me thanking you to your face and telling you how nice it is to give a gift "doesn't count" then you are too high maintenance to know.

How long ago did you give the gift? It's still "off to college" season and, as a PP said, a very busy time. You may get a note in October. Or November.

I was brought up to hand-write notes and I make my DD write them, but sometimes things slip. We try to be grateful and thoughtful in sending a note, but we also hope our friends extend some understanding over something relatively minor and formulaic.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I only have young kids but I had to take this off of my very overwhelming to do list. We appreciate gifts and the people who give them. I send a text with a photo of my kid using the gift when I can, the rest I just let it go. Apologies in advance to anyone who is offended. I can't do it all.

This. I would gladly even take gift giving off the table to save me the headache of having people offended. We don't mean to offend. If your intention in giving the gift is to be thanked, you can probably abstain.

What if we thank you in person when we receive the gift? Is that not good enough?

People have always been busy. It’s common courtesy to send a thank you note once you’ve had a chance to open the gift. Thanking someone for something when it’s wrapped and you don’t know what it is doesn’t count.

My mom always had my sister and me write thank you notes. I do the same thing with my daughter. In my view, it’s important to take the time to show gratitude.

Anonymous wrote:I only have young kids but I had to take this off of my very overwhelming to do list. We appreciate gifts and the people who give them. I send a text with a photo of my kid using the gift when I can, the rest I just let it go. Apologies in advance to anyone who is offended. I can't do it all.

This. I would gladly even take gift giving off the table to save me the headache of having people offended. We don't mean to offend. If your intention in giving the gift is to be thanked, you can probably abstain.

What if we thank you in person when we receive the gift? Is that not good enough?

In the past couple of years I have no received thank yous for graduation gifts or weddings.

Anonymous wrote:I only have young kids but I had to take this off of my very overwhelming to do list. We appreciate gifts and the people who give them. I send a text with a photo of my kid using the gift when I can, the rest I just let it go. Apologies in advance to anyone who is offended. I can't do it all.

The gift was for the teen. Why can't the teen text thank you???

Mine do. They might text friends "thank you" but for adults they send a written thank you note on their stationery in the mail.

Your friends have very rude kids.

Yes, many kids send thank you notes (email, text, or handwritten). However, since you gave unexpected gifts at a non-standard gift giving occasion (no one, not even my parents, gave me a gift on the way to college) that is also an incredibly hectic time, it doesn't really surprise me that the thank you notes didn't get written.

I only have young kids but I had to take this off of my very overwhelming to do list. We appreciate gifts and the people who give them. I send a text with a photo of my kid using the gift when I can, the rest I just let it go. Apologies in advance to anyone who is offended. I can't do it all.

Three of my closest friends have sent daughters off to college this Fall. I gave each of them a farewell/good luck gift. I didn't expect a formal note in the mail, but maybe an email or text even "thanks for thinking of me.?" One of the three sent an email. I'm surprised more than anything. Its this pretty much the norm these days?