I would look into i9 sports. It's an organization that offers very low key rec league sports. Everything is one day a week. The practice is held right before the game. Their focus is on sportsmanship and having fun. My DS played flag football with them when he was about 10. He was on a team with a couple of his best friends, which he loved. And it was great for the parents - no toxic environment of adults complaining about the coach, the kids, the refs, etc.

Anonymous wrote:Rec soccer will be your friend...and I'd do it asap. 7/8 is when the "better" kids start siphoning off to "higher" leagues (ridiculous, but true) and you still have lots of kids starting the sport. I like soccer because it's a big team and there's far less pressure than teams with fewer kids (flag football may be the same way). Plus it's a great way to make friends with a large group of kids, hopefully in the same school or neighborhood.

But soccer is hella boring

Anonymous wrote:DS played "only" rec soccer through U18. No travel. No club. No high school team. He played with a group of boys he started with in U9 and played for the enjoyment of it and to hang with his friends.

We also "only" do summer swim team. No club swim.

Not everything needs to be intense!

OP here. Thank you for all the replies and giving us some great ideas as to how to proceed. And playing sports for enjoyment and friendship are exactly the life lessons we are looking to encourage!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DS played "only" rec soccer through U18. No travel. No club. No high school team. He played with a group of boys he started with in U9 and played for the enjoyment of it and to hang with his friends.

We also "only" do summer swim team. No club swim.

Not everything needs to be intense!

But what kind of life-lesson is that?

NP

???

A very good one, assuming you are not joking. Life long recreation and exercise can be valuable to everyone.

Anonymous wrote:DS played "only" rec soccer through U18. No travel. No club. No high school team. He played with a group of boys he started with in U9 and played for the enjoyment of it and to hang with his friends.

We also "only" do summer swim team. No club swim.

Not everything needs to be intense!

But what kind of life-lesson is that?

DS played "only" rec soccer through U18. No travel. No club. No high school team. He played with a group of boys he started with in U9 and played for the enjoyment of it and to hang with his friends.

We also "only" do summer swim team. No club swim.

Not everything needs to be intense!

Rec soccer will be your friend...and I'd do it asap. 7/8 is when the "better" kids start siphoning off to "higher" leagues (ridiculous, but true) and you still have lots of kids starting the sport. I like soccer because it's a big team and there's far less pressure than teams with fewer kids (flag football may be the same way). Plus it's a great way to make friends with a large group of kids, hopefully in the same school or neighborhood.

We were VERY COVID cautious and didn’t do any extracurriculars the last 2 years for our 7yo twins (they were in-person for school and we decided that was enough exposure). This past summer we put them in a different sports-based camp every two weeks and now they know enough about the basic rules that I see them easily start or join pick-up games at the playground.

Anonymous wrote:Sure, encourage him again but don’t press too hard. My son didn’t get into a team sport until 5th grade and then only wanted to do it because his friends were playing. He’s now on the HS team. He doesn’t start and sometimes doesn’t play much or at all in games but he has fun. He has friends on the team and enjoys practices. The only point of sports is if they are enjoying it. My son has no desire to play in college. You are right, it helps socially later if they have a basic understanding of some games. My son went with friends to watch the first day of the NFL last weekend. It’s social. They don’t have to play them all. He wasn’t the least bit interested in any of this at 7.

+1 about not trying to hard! If you aren't cautious you can make the kid hate the sport and resent you.

You can also try doing it as a family instead. I know that your parents didn't push sports so you might not know how to play soccer, but it's never too late to learn.

Also it's pretty easy to learn how to throw a football. I'm very not into sports but I can do that.

You son sounds like my son (who is now 13). First, it will be okay. For parties and such when he was little, I just let him hang on my leg but I ignored him. I never told him to leave me. But I did not give attention. Usually after 20 minutes he would drift off and join the fray - depending on activity.

At 7, we put him on a summer swim team. He had been in lessons since 3 and was a decent swimmer. The first meet, I never said he had to swim. Just he had to sit with the team. Then when it was time for him to swim I walked over and told him he had to go over - jump in at the beep and swim across. He was terrified, but he did it and was so proud of himself.

He is an introvert and covid has done some setbacks. He now does track, swims club, and basketball. The running and swimming he enjoys because he just has to perform well. No one relies on him and he doesn't rely on others, but he gets to hang out as a team. He likes basketball because his friends are on the team, but it causes a lot more anxiety for him.

His shyness/introvertedness makes true team sports not enjoyable for him. He is much better with friends and classmates and as testosterone has hit - they definitely warm up. But get him involved with sports and activities.

Also he is 7, he is still very young. But try some activities. I will say that our summer swim team, did amazing things for my kid. There is so many social activities and the kids basically hang out with one another for hours on end.

Thanks so much for these recommendations and reassurances!

^i forgot to put suggestions. Over the years he tried rec soccer, basketball, flag football and tackle football.

Sure, encourage him again but don’t press too hard. My son didn’t get into a team sport until 5th grade and then only wanted to do it because his friends were playing. He’s now on the HS team. He doesn’t start and sometimes doesn’t play much or at all in games but he has fun. He has friends on the team and enjoys practices. The only point of sports is if they are enjoying it. My son has no desire to play in college. You are right, it helps socially later if they have a basic understanding of some games. My son went with friends to watch the first day of the NFL last weekend. It’s social. They don’t have to play them all. He wasn’t the least bit interested in any of this at 7.

Sign up for recreational sports. They are run through your town or local youth sports league, depending on where you live. Most of them will put kids on teams based on neighborhood or where they go to school. The fall season started this past weekend in most places, so it may be too late to join a team. But in the winter there will be basketball and maybe some other sports for 7 year olds. Basketball is probably the most popular winter rec sport for boys that age. Some will already be quite good at it and others will still be learning. All of it is fine in rec. There's also i9 sports in many locations. That might be easier to join for fall if you really want to try to get your son into soccer or something right now.

In addition to soccer and basketball, other popular sports for boys are baseball, lacrosse, and flag football. Look up the info for your town/league (or i9) and ask your son which sport(s) he might like to try. If you sign up for a season make him stick it out. If he hates it, don't make him do it again. Not all kids are sporty and that's ok. They will find the other non-sporty kids at recess. My son is one of the sporty kids and plays touch football every day at recess. But according to him there are plenty of kids who don't do that. Some of them just hang out and talk about Pokemon and stuff.

DS is 7 yo. When he was younger and we signed him up for different team type sports, he would cling to me or DH, and really had to be coaxed out to participate. This seems to be his personality (reluctant to try new things, needs a lot of time to warm up at birthday parties for example) and not just a function of being young. The pandemic gave us an excuse to not push the issue, but I think it’s in these last two years that kids his age have really started these activities in earnest. We are not looking for him to make travel teams or even play into HS necessarily. But I do want him to feel ok kicking around a ball when a group of kids are at the playground or at recess. I worry that not knowing how to play some sports, even at a very basic level may be isolating in our very sporty town, and keep him from making friends. My parents never really encouraged athletics, and DH is more of a skater/martial arts type, so we are not really plugged into the world of team sports, and this just never seemed all that big a deal when we were growing up. Just wondering if it’s worth it to try again, and if so, how any recommendations on how to proceed?