Just turn up the consequences fo the younger kids or intervene yourself so that your oldest has some privacy. Everyone in the family should have private space.

Teach younger kids to respect her room. In college, I had a roommate whose boyfriend would just barge in. Don’t raise that jerk.

^I do not worry too much about the what ifs. If for some reason they had it locked at night and we needed access for a medical emergency we could break down the door. That’s a lot of Ifs since they don’t usually sleep with them locked. One kid sleeps with his wide open, by choice, and mostly only locks it when he’s talking to friends in the day.

My kids have locks on their doors and started using them in the tween years. I understand wanting privacy. We knock before trying to enter and they open when asked. We don’t demand they open immediately for, um, obvious reasons. Most of the time they don’t want siblings or parents barging in if they are on a FT call with friends. We can hear them since the walls are thin in our old house and they are loud. If it were an issue, we would reevaluate but I always locked my door as a kid because I had little siblings I didn’t want coming in.

We don’t have locks on any interior doors in our home. Everyone respects a closed door.

Anonymous wrote:Maybe something like this would be an option:
https://www.amazon.com/SpyX-Door-Alarm-Intruders-Collection/dp/B085FTQRNW/ref=sr_1_3?crid=3EEMSBW8D8G2N&keywords=door+alarm+spy+gear&qid=1659620003&sprefix=door+alarm+spy%2Caps%2C71&sr=8-3

I love this idea! (DP here.) Keeps it fun and kid-appropriate and doesn't make to change hardware...

I would consider it but I would make sure siblings don't go in room without permission and give them consequences if they do.

I’d just make a rule that they must open the door immediately if you knock otherwise they lose the doorknob. This might not seem relevant now but in 5 years it will be.

Maybe something like this would be an option:
https://www.amazon.com/SpyX-Door-Alarm-Intruders-Collection/dp/B085FTQRNW/ref=sr_1_3?crid=3EEMSBW8D8G2N&keywords=door+alarm+spy+gear&qid=1659620003&sprefix=door+alarm+spy%2Caps%2C71&sr=8-3

We always had doors that locked growing up. They are easy for the parent to open with a pin or nail. You just pop it open. It is a button lock in the door knob. It’s time for some privacy. I hope you have a lock on the bathroom.

Just get one that you can pop open quickly with a paper clip or bobby pin. Keep the “key” on top of the door outside the bedroom and don’t tell the kids it’s there. Keep a spare somewhere just in case. Getting one with a key is also an option but I find others easier because you can use lots of things to get in and not just one type of key.

I wouldn't, but if you did, make sure that the lock is one that can be opened from the outside with a paperclip or the like in an emergency.

Anonymous wrote:I would just say no. Teach siblings when her door is shut they need to knock and wait for a response. I’f she isn’t home, they aren’t allowed in her room. Follow through with consequences if they keep intruding on her privacy and space

^also live in old house with the original door knobs. None lock. This is what we’ve done and it has worked well.

I would just say no. Teach siblings when her door is shut they need to knock and wait for a response. I’f she isn’t home, they aren’t allowed in her room. Follow through with consequences if they keep intruding on her privacy and space

We live in a very old house that does not have locks on the bedroom doors.

Our oldest child, 10, is asking for a lock on her door because she wants to keep her siblings out.

Before we do, are there any potential downsides that I should consider?

Some things I’ve thought about- what if she locks her door at night and we need to access the room for some reason or some medical emergency happens? Or what if one of her younger siblings lock themselves in there or there is some other battle that ensues over the locked door?