Kids in private school, but I hosted an event for a mix of HS kids recently. Most who attended were in public school. They were so polite and wonderful party guests. No difference that I noticed.

I have one in public and one in private. My public kid is actually far more polished and comfortable speaking than my private school kid.

I agree with others who said the difference is the lack of the major issues that are in many public school classes. The top half of the public school class is basically identical to the private school class.

Anonymous wrote:Yes. These days when good public schools often have college admission records that often match those of private schools, I have noticed that - to me - the private school kids may still be better off in terms of polish, manners, and ambition. It’s one of the reasons that paying private school tuition may still be worthwhile - if you can afford it.

Yikes. “If you can afford” to buy “polish” for your kid? Honey, you need to smooth off some rough edges yourself.

Yes. These days when good public schools often have college admission records that often match those of private schools, I have noticed that - to me - the private school kids may still be better off in terms of polish, manners, and ambition. It’s one of the reasons that paying private school tuition may still be worthwhile - if you can afford it.

My child has been in private and public (N Arlington country club kids) - so same socio-economics. I have found private school kids more polished. No, not snobby or entitled. More polite, friendly and able to speak comfortably with adults. Private schools have kids doing public speaking from a young age and it shows. It could be something special at our private school or it could apply to most privates. This has been my experience. I’m not sure some of these people replying have the experience of both private and public educations.

Anonymous wrote:I’ve taught in both settings. The difference is that there aren’t the widely troubled outliers in a private, because private schools can always say no. Public schools have to take that kid who will sop up 50% of the teacher’s time. The median kid in each setting is similar.

+1 refusing to admit kids who need specialized help or have behavior problems (even accepting well-connected kids sometimes get in anyway) will really change the classroom experience.

We recently switched to a private for late elementary. I did notice a difference. Its not that the private school kids are better behaved than the well behaved public school kids. Its that there are no major misbehaved kids like there were at public. The average income and education level of the parents are also higher at our private so that has an impact. That's not to say that all private school kids are angels but when you eliminate the extreme bottom of course the average goes up.

Anonymous wrote:Both my kids are have good social skills because we raised them properly. They both did cotillion (Mrs Simpsons). And of course have travelled extensively and visited museums and done cultural activities. One went to private and one to public school, so school had nothing to do with it.

I think that the people you hang out with can make you more refined. So, a high SES public school or a private school may have a similar effect. But also, of course, the activities your parents choose for you to do contribute quite a bit, too.

I’ve taught in both settings. The difference is that there aren’t the widely troubled outliers in a private, because private schools can always say no. Public schools have to take that kid who will sop up 50% of the teacher’s time. The median kid in each setting is similar.

Both my kids are have good social skills because we raised them properly. They both did cotillion (Mrs Simpsons). And of course have travelled extensively and visited museums and done cultural activities. One went to private and one to public school, so school had nothing to do with it.

Sense of entitlement and snobbery, yes quite likely.

Anonymous wrote:See: Brett Kavanaugh

See: Brett Kavanaugh

What? No haven’t you ever seen Gerorgetown prep boys out

Or Landon 😂

In all seriousness no.private schools do not make your child more refined that is absurd

Curious if private school kids tend to be more polished and hold a certain decorum. Another thread on this site indicated that private school kids are better behaved.