Anonymous wrote:I went to a top 25 university and my roommate was from a small town and had straight A's. I was impressed until I realized in the small town, just showing up and doing your work earned you an A. He failed out after the first semester -- one D and the rest F's. Couldn't handle the rigor of the engineering curriculum.
take this lesson to heart OP.
I was the whiz kid in my small town, only instead of an athlete I was full-on nerd: Quiz bowl, student body president, eagle scout, even took the ACT and got a 33 as a 9th grader.
I was the BIG FISH in my small town, with a Meh school, and not even a college town which skews way higher on income/education levels for similar sized towns.
But then I went to college (Ivy league) and it was crushing hard, demoralizing, and kind of screwed me up for life. I didn't want try after that, because I was so far behind that doing what my classmates did would take so much more effort to catch up. I graduated, with like a B-/C average in a science major, so not quite as bad as this story, but my career has ended up 100% similar to where I would be if I went to my state university and done the honors program there (my Fed job has tons of similar whiz kids from rural places who went to Penn State, VT, etc).
one advantage your kid has over me and probably this PP's roommate -- educated and informed parents. My parents assumed getting into an Ivy set me for life, and literally had no idea or guidance for major or career or anything after my Sr year in high school. the only advisors I had was my academic advisor assigned by the school, and he pushed me to go to grad school because I happened to be kind of good at one niche of my major, which was a bad fit because by the time I had managed 4 years of barely staying above water, I was just DONE with school by year 5 and dropped out and took the first job I could find.
I would recommend you focus on having your kid attend the flagship university of your home state, and do the honors program. think of it like a cheap prep school. There is no need to finish education by 22, your DD will have a great experience as a top student at her public university, and mature, grow, and then likely have really good grad/professional school options and really do well. Granted, BigLaw level law schools or med school may not be on the table then, that is why so many people strive for the Ivy in the first place, but honestly with a lackluster high school education, only someone truly exceptional would have that path on the table anyways.