I hate perfect people like OP and their defenders. "Rudeness"? Give me a break.

“She really loves what she’s doing. But it’s a lot of hard work” is appropriate to say in the moment.

But the moment has passed. So let it go.

I totally hear you OP. People say stupid things, though. So you are better off just trying to ignore it and move on.

Anonymous wrote:Your friend is an idiot. A service-oriented degree like MSW is exactly the opposite of "fun."

Not a friend though. A stranger OP just me.

Why do you care so much about what a random stranger thinks, OP?

Plus, my hope for my own kids is that they love their jobs and yes, have some fun. My oldest is doing GIS research for a professor this summer. I would hate doing this. He is acting like a 6 year old on Christmas morning. He loves it and has literally said, “it’s a lot of fun.” I’m happy for him. Getting marketable skills and doing something he loves.

Anonymous wrote:I swear so many DCUMs are just looking for reasons to be miserable.

+1 It’s the equivalent of “good for her!” Pipe down.

“Not exactly, but she finds it very rewarding.”

Make the other person feel their rudeness immediately, without making a big deal about it. Then, like the PP said, let it go.

Wow. You are reading A LOT into a single 3 letter word. As in, she said one word which IMO is pretty neutral and you have spent days replaying a 15 second conversation in your head dissecting tone, meaning, number of word spoken to each kid, etc. That is not normal. And it’s not how mentally stable people react.

You should respond by asking yourself why you feel so defensive and verklimptbabout your daughter’s career choice. And you should realize that the fact you haven’t let a *perceived* slight *by someone you just met* go after several days says a lot about you— none of it good.

This was an almost stranger making small talk. There is a 99% chance she could care less what your kid does with her life. She was in a social situation and neeed to say something. Why are you assuming the worst possible motives? And even if there was an intentional slight (which I seriously doubt), why do you care what some rando thinks?

But by all means, track down this person you barely know and demand an apology for a neutral word she probably doesn’t remember saying. If you want to seem crazy.

PS: I think getting an MSW does sound like FUN. Especially compared to a hardcore STEM degree. Abnormal Psych vs Multivariable Calc? I’d certainly take the abnormal psych.

The best response for something like that is “What do you mean?” Then see what she has to say.

Assuming MSW = Master’s in social work. Did you say MSW or did you elaborate? I am thinking she didn’t even know what an MSW was. Odd word choice (Fun!) too.

Your friend is an idiot. A service-oriented degree like MSW is exactly the opposite of "fun."

Anonymous wrote:Maybe she just doesn't have interest in social work...

That’s valid. But “Fun” seems like an odd response. It’s not like, “What did you do this weekend?” Kayaking. “Fun”.

Anonymous wrote:Someone I just met asked me what my DD is doing and I said she is getting her MSW. The woman responded, “Fun” in what I perceived to be a dismissive way. DD has a clear career path, a terrific paid internship, graduated from a top school and is at a top grad program. She will graduate without loans. I don’t get the judgment on kids who don’t go into more prestigious fields like IB, medicine, law, or even CS or engineering. She asked about my DS and he is pursuing one of the above fields and she was a lot more interested in that. I didn’t really respond. How should I respond? Still bothers me several days later.

Respond by meditating on letting this go. Her feelings about your daughter’s education and career path do not need correcting by you, in fact cannot be corrected by you, and have no impact on your life. Let. It. Go.

Maybe she just doesn't have interest in social work...

I swear so many DCUMs are just looking for reasons to be miserable.

Someone I just met asked me what my DD is doing and I said she is getting her MSW. The woman responded, “Fun” in what I perceived to be a dismissive way. DD has a clear career path, a terrific paid internship, graduated from a top school and is at a top grad program. She will graduate without loans. I don’t get the judgment on kids who don’t go into more prestigious fields like IB, medicine, law, or even CS or engineering. She asked about my DS and he is pursuing one of the above fields and she was a lot more interested in that. I didn’t really respond. How should I respond? Still bothers me several days later.