Anonymous wrote:I would never do this with friends.

I have one friend who does talk about kids with very poor behavior. She tries to avoid the bad kids.

Yeah, this isn't better. My SIL l-- and unfortunately now my (just now adult) nieces-- have made this the family pastime. I guess it didn't strike me as quite so repellant and unflattering (to my SIL) when I was younger and before I had kids (she's been my SIL for 25 years-- my kid is only 10). But it is really gross and reeks of insecurity. She gossips and complains about other people's parenting and the kids themselves, using really judgmental language. Part of it is almost affectionate at times, when she talks about her (blood) nieces and nephews. Like let me tell you about this appalling behavior and how indulgent and bad my brother and his wife are (applies to two different brothers), but with a tiny bit of indirect "the kid's got spunk" in there. So I used to think it was sort of a cultural (Midwest white) or family cultural thing. But it's... not. She's severely, severely judgmental. And I KNOW she talks sh!t about my own kid (also her niece!) and my parenting behind my back. If I didn't, it wouldn't be hard to guess! I've never heard of a single kid or parent escaping unscathed. There's always something to pick on.

Rather than the occasional hint of affection demonstrating that this is just her way of intentionally not letting anyone get too big for their britches (as if she doesn't really mean it, and she sure does love them!), I think it demonstrates that she does care about the kids, of course, on some level-- but it's compulsive with her. She's basically-- sadly-- pretty miserable. And she will sometimes admit to her own faults as a parent, too. She's actually a decent and even good mom in most respects and her kids are great, but she's filled with shame and cannot stop putting others down.

Oh, and she's a teacher! Naturally.

I don't have to stand for her behavior, though, and I won't. I walk away and I avoid allowing my kid to listen to it.

Sounds like a mean girl clique unaware of their own tackiness and poor behavior.

They probably felt comfortable around you. Dont act like you dont gossip with others moms / bad kids with your friends or people you are comfortable with.

OP, they know now that cant talk like that around you. Set your boundaries.

They have an issue with themselves. They probably weren’t loved as kids. Tell them to keep the children’s names out of their sh*ty mouths.

Anonymous wrote:They sound like momsters in yoga pants.

What did Yoga pants do to you? 🤣😂😂

Anonymous wrote:These people are not your friends

+1

Just imagine what they say about YOUR kids

OMG, I would ditch this group.

Nope, not normal, and they probably do it to you too.

They sound like momsters in yoga pants.

I would never do this with friends.

I have one friend who does talk about kids with very poor behavior. She tries to avoid the bad kids.

Anonymous wrote:Obviously it's not normal. That's horrible.

Lol +1. What’s the point of this post? Yes, there’s pretty insensitive people out there. Do you want a pat on the back, OP? Or what are you looking to get feedback on?

We have a friend who has a child who is horribly behaved. We talk about her behavior liberally when she leaves. I don’t know if it’s normal though or if we are just awful people. What you are describing sounds even more awful though.

These people are not your friends

Obviously it's not normal. That's horrible.

I was sitting in a group setting the other day with some people I know. A large topic of discussion was other people’s children. They were making fun of these people they know and their toddler and baby. How they weren’t smart like their parents. How neither of the kids were lookers. How the mother didn’t know how to dress the kids and their outfits were tacky.

I was horrified and protested. I said it’s not nice to speak ill of other people’s children. They told me to lighten up and it’s just for fun.