Anonymous
Post 04/11/2022 17:46     Subject: Re:My menstrual cycle is ruining my marriage
OP, I’m 42 and totally understand. I have always had irregular periods due to pcos and I hate that when I’m deeply upset in my marriage, I never know if it’s “real” or my period coming—and even if I know it’s pmdd, there are still kernels of truth beneath the anguish. I have been able to regulate the cycles somewhat (about every 33-36 days) through cgm tracking so I at least know if I’m near that window.


Anonymous
Post 04/11/2022 16:54     Subject: My menstrual cycle is ruining my marriage
It’s just sad menstruation is never take seriously enough to find effective solutions. Women scientists need to make it their priority.
Anonymous
Post 04/11/2022 16:51     Subject: My menstrual cycle is ruining my marriage
is hysterectomy a possible solution? You're in your later 40s, right? So I assume children aren't a goal. If you seriously think the hormonal changes brought on by your periods are ruining your marriage, considering surgery might not be as crazy as it sounds.
Anonymous
Post 04/11/2022 16:45     Subject: My menstrual cycle is ruining my marriage
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Can you take a pill continuously so you don’t get a period? A period on the bill is a fake period designed to make women feel comfortable with birth control, but it’s not medically necessary. I do this with Yaz with great results. Nice and stable all month/year.


Same.


+2.
Anonymous
Post 04/11/2022 16:43     Subject: My menstrual cycle is ruining my marriage
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:So I have irregular periods due to fibroids. I am on the oil and I take an ant anxiety medication. You may want to look into changing medications or adding a med.

Sometimes anxiety is misdiagnosed as depression.

Also therapy to learn to control your behavior.

You don't get into specifics, do I'm assuming here and I say this with love as someone who can relate but your cycle doesn't justify you treating someone badly , even if that person is your husband as we tend to excuse bad behavior when directed towards husband's.

So talk to your doctor to find out about changing meds I would look for someone who specializes in this as many primaries and gyns are useless in the matter

And a therapist/ psychiatrist or psychologist to help you develop strategies.
.

Thanks for the feedback. I’m already in therapy. I think my challenge is that I don’t even know that that is what’s happening - when I get upset, angry etc. I can only see it days later (which is an improvement but still not where I’d like to be.) I get so frustrated by figuring it out days later but it seems like the damage is done - even if I apologize.


NP. What kind of damage? What are your behaviors? I’m not quite understanding.


I get incredibly anxious about our relationship, his behaviors - reading into things that aren’t there, picking fights as a result. Sometimes I just look at him and feel anger. So the damage is really just the ongoing routine erosion of our relationship.
Anonymous
Post 04/11/2022 16:28     Subject: My menstrual cycle is ruining my marriage
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:So I have irregular periods due to fibroids. I am on the oil and I take an ant anxiety medication. You may want to look into changing medications or adding a med.

Sometimes anxiety is misdiagnosed as depression.

Also therapy to learn to control your behavior.

You don't get into specifics, do I'm assuming here and I say this with love as someone who can relate but your cycle doesn't justify you treating someone badly , even if that person is your husband as we tend to excuse bad behavior when directed towards husband's.

So talk to your doctor to find out about changing meds I would look for someone who specializes in this as many primaries and gyns are useless in the matter

And a therapist/ psychiatrist or psychologist to help you develop strategies.
.

Thanks for the feedback. I’m already in therapy. I think my challenge is that I don’t even know that that is what’s happening - when I get upset, angry etc. I can only see it days later (which is an improvement but still not where I’d like to be.) I get so frustrated by figuring it out days later but it seems like the damage is done - even if I apologize.


NP. What kind of damage? What are your behaviors? I’m not quite understanding.
Anonymous
Post 04/11/2022 16:22     Subject: My menstrual cycle is ruining my marriage
Anonymous wrote:Have you looked into longer term hormonal birth control (IUD, shot, etc) if the low dose hormones help keep you on an even keel?


I am due for an annual gyn appt later this spring but I think they have me on a low dose pill because of age and health history
Anonymous
Post 04/11/2022 16:21     Subject: My menstrual cycle is ruining my marriage
Anonymous wrote:So I have irregular periods due to fibroids. I am on the oil and I take an ant anxiety medication. You may want to look into changing medications or adding a med.

Sometimes anxiety is misdiagnosed as depression.

Also therapy to learn to control your behavior.

You don't get into specifics, do I'm assuming here and I say this with love as someone who can relate but your cycle doesn't justify you treating someone badly , even if that person is your husband as we tend to excuse bad behavior when directed towards husband's.

So talk to your doctor to find out about changing meds I would look for someone who specializes in this as many primaries and gyns are useless in the matter

And a therapist/ psychiatrist or psychologist to help you develop strategies.
.

Thanks for the feedback. I’m already in therapy. I think my challenge is that I don’t even know that that is what’s happening - when I get upset, angry etc. I can only see it days later (which is an improvement but still not where I’d like to be.) I get so frustrated by figuring it out days later but it seems like the damage is done - even if I apologize.
Anonymous
Post 04/11/2022 09:44     Subject: My menstrual cycle is ruining my marriage
Buspar and uterine ablation
Anonymous
Post 04/11/2022 09:41     Subject: My menstrual cycle is ruining my marriage
Have you looked into longer term hormonal birth control (IUD, shot, etc) if the low dose hormones help keep you on an even keel?
Anonymous
Post 04/11/2022 09:38     Subject: My menstrual cycle is ruining my marriage
Anonymous wrote:Can you take a pill continuously so you don’t get a period? A period on the bill is a fake period designed to make women feel comfortable with birth control, but it’s not medically necessary. I do this with Yaz with great results. Nice and stable all month/year.


Same.
Anonymous
Post 04/11/2022 09:36     Subject: My menstrual cycle is ruining my marriage
Can you take a pill continuously so you don’t get a period? A period on the bill is a fake period designed to make women feel comfortable with birth control, but it’s not medically necessary. I do this with Yaz with great results. Nice and stable all month/year.
Anonymous
Post 04/11/2022 09:35     Subject: My menstrual cycle is ruining my marriage
This is PMDD. You may need a different antidepressant.
Anonymous
Post 04/11/2022 09:19     Subject: My menstrual cycle is ruining my marriage
So I have irregular periods due to fibroids. I am on the oil and I take an ant anxiety medication. You may want to look into changing medications or adding a med.

Sometimes anxiety is misdiagnosed as depression.

Also therapy to learn to control your behavior.

You don't get into specifics, do I'm assuming here and I say this with love as someone who can relate but your cycle doesn't justify you treating someone badly , even if that person is your husband as we tend to excuse bad behavior when directed towards husband's.

So talk to your doctor to find out about changing meds I would look for someone who specializes in this as many primaries and gyns are useless in the matter

And a therapist/ psychiatrist or psychologist to help you develop strategies.
Anonymous
Post 04/11/2022 08:48     Subject: My menstrual cycle is ruining my marriage
We have been married for 18 years. My periods have always been irregular - on the pill or off. I finally realized about 3-4 years ago that there may be some connection to my insecurities and depression and my period and our marriage - and that depression, anxiety and insecurity renders itself in ways that negatively impact our marriage. That’s not to say he’s perfect - we both have stuff. But this feels like something that should be controllable - a variable we can take out of the equation. I am on a low dose pill (in my late 40s) and I take an anti-depressant. I track my periods but they are all over the place even on the pill.

Has anyone figured out a solution to the insanity that accompanies your period?