^and I'm an absolute freak. Spouse just never went down that road with me. His loss!

It did take a hit. OW was younger. I questioned what made her worth cheating with that I didn't have. It just took time mentally to understand that she didn't have anything special. It was a character flaw within the two of them that made them cheat.

I did find that I, too, could have cheated with way hotter guys if I chose (I didn't- I waited until after divorce). Turns out my spouse was absolutely nothing special in bed. There are guys WAY WAY more interesting to date, talk to, daydream about, and do a lot of um, exploring with.

Lost 70 pounds. Went to a derm spa and got my skin together. Bought new clothes. Leaned way in at work, got promoted, then got a new job with big title and paycheck. Met new man, began committed relationship

Oh good, the sockpuppeting Ashley Madison victim bitter wife has another thread to hijack!

I agree pps. Why would anyone’s self esteem go down after nasty cheaters? They are lying scum with no integrity.

Anonymous wrote:Not once did my self-esteem take a hit.

I knew it had nothing to do with me. I’m fun, hot, have a thriving career, was an excellent mother and fantastic mother—good in the sack too. I get hit on a lot and constantly told I’m beautiful—even at my age.

As the pp said, it’s about the cheater. His case lots of trauma and issues. He was the first to say it had absolutely nothing to do with anything about me.

Maybe it’s because I was so much better than who he cheated with and she was the same age that it didn’t affect my self esteem at all.

It just made me think less of him and look at her with pity for what she sunk to and how little she settled for, and how nasty they were for doing what they did to their spouses. Basically a couple middle aged whores, screwing immediately after meeting online.

Gross. I don’t want any part of that and certainly don’t need to resort to offering my v-jay for free online to get a “date”. Lol

Oh- yes! I had the same immediate thought. Just: wow! I didn’t know middle aged married people were such dumb whores to bang others the first time they meet with no qualms about personal or health safety. No condoms. The first time meeting up which was the first time they banged.

I would never be that nasty and if I wanted to screw other people, I’d divorce…not whore around and hide and secret message and act like a pathetic loser.

My self-esteem actually grew after all of it because I lived my life honorably, was a loyal person with a great career, not a loser who couldn’t support myself on my own at 50 and was running around sucking off strange D for nothing. Zero class. Trash. Jerry Springer material.

Not once did my self-esteem take a hit.

I knew it had nothing to do with me. I’m fun, hot, have a thriving career, was an excellent mother and fantastic mother—good in the sack too. I get hit on a lot and constantly told I’m beautiful—even at my age.

As the pp said, it’s about the cheater. His case lots of trauma and issues. He was the first to say it had absolutely nothing to do with anything about me.

Maybe it’s because I was so much better than who he cheated with and she was the same age that it didn’t affect my self esteem at all.

It just made me think less of him and look at her with pity for what she sunk to and how little she settled for, and how nasty they were for doing what they did to their spouses. Basically a couple middle aged whores, screwing immediately after meeting online.

Gross. I don’t want any part of that and certainly don’t need to resort to offering my v-jay for free online to get a “date”. Lol

Anonymous wrote:Don’t let them do that to you. Your worth has nothing to do with their cheating.

+1000 FTFY

Girl, if he wasn't good for you, he isn't good for anybody, ok? Don't let your emotions fool you. He was no good

I might want to view as that person had cancer and died. They had a disease and it wasn't about your cooking, your look or even you at all. It was in their genes, their environment growing up, their lock of integrity, their sin.

You will go through
The 7 stages of grief

Shock and denial. This is a state of disbelief and numbed feelings.
Pain and guilt. ...
Anger and bargaining. ...
Depression. ...
The upward turn. ...
Reconstruction and working through. ...
Acceptance and hope.

Time heals everything! Sending you good vibe and hope soon~

Anonymous wrote:If not your spouse, just dating, you already won. You aren't wasting time anymore on someone who isn't marriage material. They made you unavailable for a period to pursue your life partner. You are now winning.

This. End of thread.

Well, the thread can continue for those who are married. That's a different ball game.

Don’t let them do that to you. Your worth has little to do with their cheating.

If not your spouse, just dating, you already won. You aren't wasting time anymore on someone who isn't marriage material. They made you unavailable for a period to pursue your life partner. You are now winning.

Husband, BF? GF?

If they moved on faster than you after they cheated how did you mend or recoup during this pandemic?