Make a vow to yourself not to be late. Nothing is worse or more disrespectful than a constantly late parent.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a nanny.

My advice for the parents ...

Be on time as much as possible (let us know when you can't so we can plan)

Be respectful and don't ask things that aren't part of our job (like cleaning up after yourself ie your coffee mug in the morning), we'll probably do these things anyway if you're a nice employer but don't expect it

Let us know when we do something you don't like, don't let it escalate until it really bothers you

What would really annoy me is that somebody can't handle dealing with my coffee mug in my house. It's bad enough when nannies are above taking care of minor household items even though they are at the house all day. What would be even worse is it they were inconvenienced by a dirty coffee mug. To answer the OPs question, you already sound like a nice person - you don't have to stress about this. Just be yourself and it will be fine.

NP here. As a nanny, it’s the principle not the occasional act itself. Plus my employers used to leave half-full coffee mugs where the kids could reach them and I didn’t know they were there until they were spilled.

What’s the principle that you are opposed to? On principle, you are upset because people leave dirty things around? I mean, I get that on some level. It’s your workspace and they should have enough respect to keep it clean. But in reality, it’s their home, not a traditional workplace. I would expect somebody working in my home to not get irritated about regular home type things happening in the home.

You seem very respectful and open so I’m going to give you a nanny’s perspective (especially an experienced nanny). The principle is that nannies are not hired to clean up after adults First, there is the issue of job-creep. Many of us have started with one dirty coffee mug and just washed it. Then there’s the cereal bowl, the egg pan left in the sink that we need access to, and then the nanny has last night’s dirty dinner dishes. I promise you that this happens and happened to me. I couldn’t just leave the dishes because I needed the sink. Nannies have learned through experience to draw a hard line.

Second, it is your home but when you hire someone to work there, it is their workplace. I’m speaking of the common kid-welcome spaces. If you left your clothes or dishes in your bedroom, office or any area where the kids aren’t, I would never see them or care.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a nanny.

My advice for the parents ...

Be on time as much as possible (let us know when you can't so we can plan)

Be respectful and don't ask things that aren't part of our job (like cleaning up after yourself ie your coffee mug in the morning), we'll probably do these things anyway if you're a nice employer but don't expect it

Let us know when we do something you don't like, don't let it escalate until it really bothers you

What would really annoy me is that somebody can't handle dealing with my coffee mug in my house. It's bad enough when nannies are above taking care of minor household items even though they are at the house all day. What would be even worse is it they were inconvenienced by a dirty coffee mug. To answer the OPs question, you already sound like a nice person - you don't have to stress about this. Just be yourself and it will be fine.

NP here. As a nanny, it’s the principle not the occasional act itself. Plus my employers used to leave half-full coffee mugs where the kids could reach them and I didn’t know they were there until they were spilled.

What’s the principle that you are opposed to? On principle, you are upset because people leave dirty things around? I mean, I get that on some level. It’s your workspace and they should have enough respect to keep it clean. But in reality, it’s their home, not a traditional workplace. I would expect somebody working in my home to not get irritated about regular home type things happening in the home.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a nanny.

My advice for the parents ...

Be on time as much as possible (let us know when you can't so we can plan)

Be respectful and don't ask things that aren't part of our job (like cleaning up after yourself ie your coffee mug in the morning), we'll probably do these things anyway if you're a nice employer but don't expect it

Let us know when we do something you don't like, don't let it escalate until it really bothers you

What would really annoy me is that somebody can't handle dealing with my coffee mug in my house. It's bad enough when nannies are above taking care of minor household items even though they are at the house all day. What would be even worse is it they were inconvenienced by a dirty coffee mug. To answer the OPs question, you already sound like a nice person - you don't have to stress about this. Just be yourself and it will be fine.

NP here. As a nanny, it’s the principle not the occasional act itself. Plus my employers used to leave half-full coffee mugs where the kids could reach them and I didn’t know they were there until they were spilled.

Anonymous wrote:I'm a nanny.

My advice for the parents ...

Be on time as much as possible (let us know when you can't so we can plan)

Be respectful and don't ask things that aren't part of our job (like cleaning up after yourself ie your coffee mug in the morning), we'll probably do these things anyway if you're a nice employer but don't expect it

Let us know when we do something you don't like, don't let it escalate until it really bothers you

What would really annoy me is that somebody can't handle dealing with my coffee mug in my house. It's bad enough when nannies are above taking care of minor household items even though they are at the house all day. What would be even worse is it they were inconvenienced by a dirty coffee mug. To answer the OPs question, you already sound like a nice person - you don't have to stress about this. Just be yourself and it will be fine.

I'm a nanny.

My advice for the parents ...

Be on time as much as possible (let us know when you can't so we can plan)

Be respectful and don't ask things that aren't part of our job (like cleaning up after yourself ie your coffee mug in the morning), we'll probably do these things anyway if you're a nice employer but don't expect it

Let us know when we do something you don't like, don't let it escalate until it really bothers you

Anonymous wrote:We made the mistake of getting home at 5:30, and then wanting the nanny to talk to us about the kids before leaving. It took us a few weeks to say "Hey, should we um ... change your end time to 5:45?"

This was much better - we weren't stressed if we ran into traffic and the nanny didn't have to get annoyed that we were keeping them from their own life after work.

Nanny here.
I hate it to spend 15 minutes speaking about my day with the parents, it's way too much.
From time to time it's really ok but on a daily basis? no!

Anonymous wrote:We made the mistake of getting home at 5:30, and then wanting the nanny to talk to us about the kids before leaving. It took us a few weeks to say "Hey, should we um ... change your end time to 5:45?"

This was much better - we weren't stressed if we ran into traffic and the nanny didn't have to get annoyed that we were keeping them from their own life after work.

Yes, this is a great point. Nanny should be walking out your door at her end time, not you arriving home at the end time.

We made the mistake of getting home at 5:30, and then wanting the nanny to talk to us about the kids before leaving. It took us a few weeks to say "Hey, should we um ... change your end time to 5:45?"

This was much better - we weren't stressed if we ran into traffic and the nanny didn't have to get annoyed that we were keeping them from their own life after work.

Anonymous wrote:Curious- did you hire through an agency? If so, which one?

What about flowers and a coffee or tea to welcome her on her first day

No. We found her searching profiles on care.com. Flowers are a great idea!

Curious- did you hire through an agency? If so, which one?

What about flowers and a coffee or tea to welcome her on her first day

Yes to the above.

Also do not feel bad/jealous if she talks about or misses her former charges. It’s a great sign that she’s bonded with them and certainly doesn’t mean she won’t love or bond with your baby too.

Anonymous wrote:Hi OP, to start on the right foot, keep an open and honest communication between you and the nanny. Make clear expectations of what you want from her.

if anything comes up you should always talk to nanny before letting something small become a big problem.

honesty is the best policy

Thank you! OP here and I absolutely intend to do this.

Hi OP, to start on the right foot, keep an open and honest communication between you and the nanny. Make clear expectations of what you want from her.

if anything comes up you should always talk to nanny before letting something small become a big problem.

honesty is the best policy

We’re very excited to have found a wonderful nanny and want to make her feel as comfortable as possible as well as welcomed. What can we do to start on the right foot?

I’ve been reading this forum and the nanny forum obsessively for months!

Thanks!