Many times when I was younger, especially in crowded bars/events where it was hard to pinpoint the perpetrator. There was so much misogyny and shame surrounding this kind of thing (first question- “what were you wearing?”) in the late 80s/through the 90s that women generally didn’t report much, short of rape. I’m 52.

Twice for me. Once dancing at a club as a teenager—snuck in with a fake ID—some random stranger started dancing behind me and putting his hands up my shorts. Then a few years later on a packed subway in NYC, guy smushed right up behind me was basically grinding into me for a few minutes until enough people got off the train that I could move far away.

Anonymous wrote:Hundreds of times when I've been at a bar or club or at a party.

In those places, that's being friendly.

Hundreds of times when I've been at a bar or club or at a party.

This has never happened to me. I am surprised at how many people here are saying it has happened frequently to them. I am older than some of you responding, in my late fifties, so maybe guys weren’t doing this kind of thing when I was younger.

Anonymous wrote:There's a good thread on the show Sex Education about public transportation sexual harassment. Made me remember that awful paralyzed and powerless feeling from my teenage years. I hope more people realize that it's a crime nowadays.

+1 80s and 90s (ik, I'm old). A few times when I was under 18. Yea, you feel powerless and gross.

Many times as a teen/young adult. The first time I was 14-15, at a county fair and a grown man smacked my butt. I was horrified and probably scowled at him, but felt helpless since I was essentially still a kid. Several times on public transportation, in crowded bars, waiting in a line. When I could tell who it was I spoke up loudly, but I never really thought to report. I did get a guy kicked out of a bar for repeatedly touching my friend.

There's a good thread on the show Sex Education about public transportation sexual harassment. Made me remember that awful paralyzed and powerless feeling from my teenage years. I hope more people realize that it's a crime nowadays.

I was groped many times on the train back in the 90’s in another country. I was reading books and those men got surprised when I hit the part with my elbow and “accidentally” with my umbrella.

I was groped innumerable times. Transportation, on the street, and a few times at dance clubs. I never thought of it as a crime, never reported it, even had a hard time telling the groper to stop or leave me alone. I am almost 50 and I look back on that sort of incredulously, but I can still put myself back in my shoes and I just feel paralyzed and ashamed, like I was the one doing something wrong. I was raised by feminist parents who in no way made me think I owed men access to my body, and I am a big, powerfully built woman and always have been. It didn't matter.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Countless times in the 1990s. It was mainly relatively anonymous - man rubbing his crotch on my shoulder while I was seated on a bus and he was standing next to me, man grabbing me late at night when I was walking home. I never felt empowered enough to speak up.

Did you think of it as a crime back then?

PP here - No I didn’t. I thought it was gross on public transportation. When the man grabbed me late at night, I blamed myself for walking alone. I never considered any of the incidents a crime nor did I consider informing law enforcement.

PP again - I realize now that it was a crime!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Countless times in the 1990s. It was mainly relatively anonymous - man rubbing his crotch on my shoulder while I was seated on a bus and he was standing next to me, man grabbing me late at night when I was walking home. I never felt empowered enough to speak up.

Did you think of it as a crime back then?

PP here - No I didn’t. I thought it was gross on public transportation. When the man grabbed me late at night, I blamed myself for walking alone. I never considered any of the incidents a crime nor did I consider informing law enforcement.

Anonymous wrote:Countless times in the 1990s. It was mainly relatively anonymous - man rubbing his crotch on my shoulder while I was seated on a bus and he was standing next to me, man grabbing me late at night when I was walking home. I never felt empowered enough to speak up.

Did you think of it as a crime back then?

Countless times in the 1990s. It was mainly relatively anonymous - man rubbing his crotch on my shoulder while I was seated on a bus and he was standing next to me, man grabbing me late at night when I was walking home. I never felt empowered enough to speak up.

Have you been groped? Where did it happen? It's happened to me many times (like on the subway for example) and while it pissed me off, I didn't report it to the cops because I thought it wasn't even a crime. Groping is considered sexual assault now, but years ago it wasn't, am I right?