Don’t contact her about this so soon.

I did something like that after a friend had a baby. While I wanted to make sure the gift had arrived, I believe it came off as me seeking a thank you note. Awful. Please learn from my mistake.

Why don’t you text her to ask how she’s doing? I lost my mom last year and those check-in texts from friends meant everything to me. I’m sure she will mention the flowers. And as others have said, after a parent dies, lots of things fall through the cracks. I could barely get dressed in the morning and I was not super timely in thanking people for stuff. I did my best.

Maybe she’s going to actually send a thank you note? Please don’t call after a day!

I would check in and ask it another day. Somebody sent me Omaha steaks and they were actually right next to a bush next to our front door which we don’t often use. The box was kind of obscured unless looking for it. I found it like 3 days later and of course all was rotten. I wish I had been clued in because it was a waste of money for them and gift for me.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Back off. Maybe she got them, maybe she didn't. When you do check in with her PLEASE don't ask about the flowers. She how she is doing.

+1000 don't make this about you, which is what you'll do if you ask about the flowers.

Yep. Just check in, express condolences, ask how's she doing.

Anonymous wrote:Back off. Maybe she got them, maybe she didn't. When you do check in with her PLEASE don't ask about the flowers. She how she is doing.

+1000 don't make this about you, which is what you'll do if you ask about the flowers.

If you are friendly with her DH sent a quick note saying "Hey I sent Larla flowers but the tracking isn't working and I don't want to bother her to ask if she got them. Do you know if they arrived? They're purple with a blue vase. I'm so sorry about Bob, Todd. Hope you guys are doing ok."

Her dad just died. She's not thinking about thanking anyone for flowers. Check in on how she is doing, don't ask about the flowers.

Meh, I would probably text message to check in. It sounds like it’s a good friend that this wouldn’t be intrusive.

I would wait 48 hours total and then send a quick text message. I have had perishable things delivered to a side porch we never use and would never have known about it unless the gift giver gave me the heads up about it.

Anonymous wrote:Assume they were delivered and ask the next time you see her. Fedex is not going to leave flowers "under a bush" 99.5% chance that she is overwhelmed and just didn't reach out. 0.05% chance they were mis-delivered.

We lost my husband's mom this summer and there were so many moving parts that I know we dropped balls in terms of acknowledging things.

Please don't call/text/email and make her feel like an ass for not reaching out to you to acknowledge the flowers.

+1

This would be the last thing on my mind. Please don't bring this up. Assume they were delivered.

Back off. Maybe she got them, maybe she didn't. When you do check in with her PLEASE don't ask about the flowers. She how she is doing.

Assume they were delivered and ask the next time you see her. Fedex is not going to leave flowers "under a bush" 99.5% chance that she is overwhelmed and just didn't reach out. 0.05% chance they were mis-delivered.

We lost my husband's mom this summer and there were so many moving parts that I know we dropped balls in terms of acknowledging things.

Please don't call/text/email and make her feel like an ass for not reaching out to you to acknowledge the flowers.

A friend who lives on the opposite coast than me lost her father a few weeks ago. I waited until she was back in town from services for a few days before sending a condolence card and flowers. They were confirmed delivered and left by FedEx (signature not required). I haven’t heard from her since they were delivered (about 1.5 days). I know they are in town, and I’m presuming are just busy, but part of me wonders if the flowers could have been misdelivered or were left by a side door they don’t frequent. I am of course not demanding a thank you or anything at all like that, rather she’s the type of person who would let me know something was received, and I wanna make sure she got them .... but I don’t want to bother her at the same time. What would you do? Send a quick text or wait another couple days or not mention anything and see if I eventually hear from her? Trying to give her space as she settles back in, but I also know she would feel badly if the package was under a bush or something that she found a few weeks from now.