Anonymous
Post 09/11/2021 22:06     Subject: If You Quit To Be A SAHM
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP, how chaotic of a home do your want? How much chaos is okay for your children to experience from day to day? How often is it okay to drop the ball on making sure your family runs well? How much confusion and anxiety do you want to inflict on your children? Because working full time means chaos, confusion and stress runs your home first and foremost. Your employer always comes first -- that's the truth. Your kids know that, but they can work it out with extensive therapy after they grow up, I guess.

Your either put your children first or yourself first. If you want well-adjusted children, you put them first. Always.


Don’t listen to this person. Many people who work FT have well-adjusted kids and their jobs don’t come first.


Yep, this. Every home where both parents work isn’t chaotic.


Every home with two working parents is not chaotic.
Anonymous
Post 09/11/2021 21:18     Subject: If You Quit To Be A SAHM
Anonymous wrote:OP, how chaotic of a home do your want? How much chaos is okay for your children to experience from day to day? How often is it okay to drop the ball on making sure your family runs well? How much confusion and anxiety do you want to inflict on your children? Because working full time means chaos, confusion and stress runs your home first and foremost. Your employer always comes first -- that's the truth. Your kids know that, but they can work it out with extensive therapy after they grow up, I guess.

Your either put your children first or yourself first. If you want well-adjusted children, you put them first. Always.


Yeah. They can.
Meanwhile, I can give therapy to hundreds of other children who have been in much worse situations.
Anonymous
Post 09/11/2021 19:55     Subject: If You Quit To Be A SAHM
I've found it difficult, mainly due to my husband's job. He is always on call and so I have to be available for childcare, finding a nanny or babysitter last minute can be difficult on a regular basis. I often wish we had family in the area who could help out in such pinches. I ended up having to take a highly flexible WFH job but the pay is crap.
Anonymous
Post 09/11/2021 19:31     Subject: If You Quit To Be A SAHM
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP, how chaotic of a home do your want? How much chaos is okay for your children to experience from day to day? How often is it okay to drop the ball on making sure your family runs well? How much confusion and anxiety do you want to inflict on your children? Because working full time means chaos, confusion and stress runs your home first and foremost. Your employer always comes first -- that's the truth. Your kids know that, but they can work it out with extensive therapy after they grow up, I guess.

Your either put your children first or yourself first. If you want well-adjusted children, you put them first. Always.


Don’t listen to this person. Many people who work FT have well-adjusted kids and their jobs don’t come first.


Yep, this. Every home where both parents work isn’t chaotic.
Anonymous
Post 09/11/2021 19:27     Subject: If You Quit To Be A SAHM
Anonymous wrote:OP, how chaotic of a home do your want? How much chaos is okay for your children to experience from day to day? How often is it okay to drop the ball on making sure your family runs well? How much confusion and anxiety do you want to inflict on your children? Because working full time means chaos, confusion and stress runs your home first and foremost. Your employer always comes first -- that's the truth. Your kids know that, but they can work it out with extensive therapy after they grow up, I guess.

Your either put your children first or yourself first. If you want well-adjusted children, you put them first. Always.


Maybe you couldn’t do it all but many moms can multi-task. There are many loving homes with two working parents.
Anonymous
Post 09/11/2021 19:26     Subject: If You Quit To Be A SAHM
Anonymous wrote:OP, how chaotic of a home do your want? How much chaos is okay for your children to experience from day to day? How often is it okay to drop the ball on making sure your family runs well? How much confusion and anxiety do you want to inflict on your children? Because working full time means chaos, confusion and stress runs your home first and foremost. Your employer always comes first -- that's the truth. Your kids know that, but they can work it out with extensive therapy after they grow up, I guess.

Your either put your children first or yourself first. If you want well-adjusted children, you put them first. Always.


You’re a moron.
Anonymous
Post 09/11/2021 19:25     Subject: If You Quit To Be A SAHM
Anonymous wrote:OP, how chaotic of a home do your want? How much chaos is okay for your children to experience from day to day? How often is it okay to drop the ball on making sure your family runs well? How much confusion and anxiety do you want to inflict on your children? Because working full time means chaos, confusion and stress runs your home first and foremost. Your employer always comes first -- that's the truth. Your kids know that, but they can work it out with extensive therapy after they grow up, I guess.

Your either put your children first or yourself first. If you want well-adjusted children, you put them first. Always.


Don’t listen to this person. Many people who work FT have well-adjusted kids and their jobs don’t come first.
Anonymous
Post 09/11/2021 19:20     Subject: If You Quit To Be A SAHM
Anonymous wrote:If you quit your job and stayed home while you have 2-3 kids, did you find returning to work easy or hard? Do you wish you would have continued to work PT?


If I had a do over I would have taken a short period of time off and then tried to find a comfortable way to go back to work. However with no caring grandmother nearby, I did the next best thing which was stay at home as long as I could (3 yrs) and then went back to work. IT WAS HORRIBLE.

Ideally I would take 6 months off and then go back with someone I really trusted and loved my baby. The adjustment is really hard and you will face aggressions for your choice to stay at home.
Anonymous
Post 09/11/2021 19:15     Subject: If You Quit To Be A SAHM
OP, how chaotic of a home do your want? How much chaos is okay for your children to experience from day to day? How often is it okay to drop the ball on making sure your family runs well? How much confusion and anxiety do you want to inflict on your children? Because working full time means chaos, confusion and stress runs your home first and foremost. Your employer always comes first -- that's the truth. Your kids know that, but they can work it out with extensive therapy after they grow up, I guess.

Your either put your children first or yourself first. If you want well-adjusted children, you put them first. Always.
Anonymous
Post 09/11/2021 19:06     Subject: If You Quit To Be A SAHM
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:If you love being home, you can afford for you to be home, your husband supports it, there is your answer. No regrets staying home. Degrees are great, have a few but degrees shouldn't define you or push you in a direction that isn't best for you.


OP here. I do love being at home but I do miss work and want to go back at some point.


Then, compromise and go back part time if you can.
Anonymous
Post 09/11/2021 19:00     Subject: If You Quit To Be A SAHM
Anonymous wrote:If you love being home, you can afford for you to be home, your husband supports it, there is your answer. No regrets staying home. Degrees are great, have a few but degrees shouldn't define you or push you in a direction that isn't best for you.


OP here. I do love being at home but I do miss work and want to go back at some point.
Anonymous
Post 09/11/2021 18:56     Subject: Re:If You Quit To Be A SAHM
I stayed very part time.

I am back to 50% now and finding it hard to keep it that way. I feel like I get pressure to work more than I want to rather than pressure to opt out all together. Maybe other industries are different though.
Anonymous
Post 09/11/2021 18:56     Subject: If You Quit To Be A SAHM
If you love being home, you can afford for you to be home, your husband supports it, there is your answer. No regrets staying home. Degrees are great, have a few but degrees shouldn't define you or push you in a direction that isn't best for you.
Anonymous
Post 09/11/2021 18:45     Subject: If You Quit To Be A SAHM
OP here. I quit my job and took a 6 month maternity leave but extended it to a year. I planned to go back now but we are trying to get pregnant with our second child. I want to stay home but I worked really hard on my degrees and feel like I’m throwing them away. I’ve loved being home but I feel the longer I stay home, the harder it will be to return to work.
Anonymous
Post 09/11/2021 18:24     Subject: If You Quit To Be A SAHM
If you quit your job and stayed home while you have 2-3 kids, did you find returning to work easy or hard? Do you wish you would have continued to work PT?