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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]To: Heather, Choice Communications

From: Jane Capstitcher

Hey girl,
I'm getting HUNDREDS of DMs asking if Trevor and I are still together and IDK what to tell people. My hundreds of thousands of fans have noticed that he's no longer commenting on my Instagram posts or replying to my comments.

I've sent him 35+ texts over the past six hours and he hasn't answered. I know he's so incredibly busy with...well, whatever it is that he does, lol, but if we're going to continue to present ourselves to the internet as a couple, I need something. I heard those DC Urban Moms trolls - TROLLS I TELL YA - are making fun of me for being a thirsty white lady. 
Halp a sister out.

xoxoxJane
P.S. Brunch and all the thinggggggggggggggs soon, k? Hugs.

To: The Trevor Barrett Project

From: Heather, Choice Communications

DUDE.

Are you going to tell her or am I going to tell her? I'm completely in your corner on this one but you can't just ghost Jane Capstitcher after she's perpetuated this big love story for almost two years. Closure, dude.

I recommend just ripping the bandaid off. I can provide you with some talking points and you two can hop on a Zoom or something.

Breakups are not in the scope of our contract and if I have to do it, it's going to cost you and can I be real with you for a minute? You're not doing too well. Those tee shirt sales have really plummeted.

Just get it over with. I know you bought Sydney an iPhone, which Jane interprets as a sign of everlasting committment and didn't outright tell her no when she suggested she wanted get horizontal with you in Dr. Ruth's memory. BTW, ick. Might take some bleach to get THAT image out of my brain.

LMK soonest,
Heather

To: Heather, Choice Communications

From: The Trevor Barrett Project

That's dope.[/quote]

this is amazing!!!!  who are you??  i am crying with laughter literally.

Dope??  DOPE??!!![/quote]

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