Reply to Here is a hill to die on: Ban on showers hosted by Mom or MIL

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Reply to "Here is a hill to die on: Ban on showers hosted by Mom or MIL"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]But a baby shower after the baby is born where all the guests are friend of MIL is just tacky as all get-out. Even worse when OP politely declined a pre-birth shower in the first place.[/quote]

See, I think this situation is far less tacky if it's done after the baby is born (though calling it a shower at that point would be confusing).  Grandma is clearly excited to show off her new grandchild.  And if her friends aren't offended by coming to a situation where they are expected to bring a gift, well that's kind of between grandma and her friends.

OP, I understand being annoyed at your MIL not respecting your wishes, but I think you are going out of your way to feel embarrassed.  Your MIL knows her friends better than you, and it's highly doubtful that they think less of you for having been the guest of honor at this event.  And on the off chance that they do, who cares?  You already said you will probably never see most of these people again.

I think it's legitimate to have a beef with MIL disrespecting your wishes.  But don't pretend this is about etiquette.  What she did to you is hurtful, not "rude" in a miss manners sense.  Let the guests make their own determination if they think your MIL is rude for hosting such an event...DCUM is clearly split on the issue.[/quote]

Op here, and I think you are mostly correct. Thanks for weighing in in such a measured manner. [/quote]

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