Reply to I realized my marriage was over at the dinner table

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Congratulations, OP!  I had a similar epiphany.  Long story short is that my husband refused to seek treatment for his mental health issues and it was having a huge toll on me and the kids.  I was spent, beat down and used up.  I'll never forget him sitting at the table, surfing the 'net when I told him I really needed him to take the kids to school the next day and pick them up (he was unemployed at the time)  The look he gave me was what finally broke me.  It was so full of annoyance, so inconvenienced, so uncaring that I knew that it was never going to get better and there was no point in me struggling any more.  It was, literally, a snap - probably a lot like yours!

I'll never, ever, forget what a relief it was!  My struggle was over!  My burden lifted! There was nothing more for me to withstand.  It was an amazing feeling and I'm so glad you go to that point!  Hugs![/quote]

I've had many such moments over the years of my dead marriage. Most recently, it was when he told me I desperately needed emotional regulation when I began crying during an argument. They were tears of hopelessness, b/c DH was not listening or understanding.

Pro-tip for husbands: try hugging your wife when she's crying, not lecturing her. Also don't get married if you are fine with twice a'year sex. [/quote]

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