Reply to This stepmonster gem from Carolyn Hax

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Those girls are never coming home to visit with step monster there.

What an awful thing - girls probably didn't even have time to grieve for their mother before monster moved in.

Dad - you suck.[/quote]

Don't know why the Dad is getting a pass here.  If he wanted to remarry, he needed to find someone who would embrace joining the existing family and shared the existing values, eg the value of a private education.  Falling in love is simply not enough in this type of situation.  Why did he remarry someone who clearly does not share his interest in his daughters?

A colleague of mine married someone with a child for whom he had partial custody and she would complain constantly about his time away from her for doing things like being a boy scout leader and going to weekend camp outs with his son instead of spending the time with her.

I blame him for marrying someone who was so uninterested in his son and who had so much antipathy towards him.  Not that she was a gem of a stepmom.[/quote]

The Dad's first wife died 4 years ago. That's plenty of time for everyone to grieve and for him subsequently to meet a new wife.

Dad has told the Stepmonster no. As long as he sticks to that, then he does not suck.

It is unreasonable to expect a stepparent to have the same "interest" in stepchildren as the biological parent. It is not necessary for the stepparent to do so as long as the biological parent defends the children's interests.[/quote]

There is a difference between a) the step-parent not being as invested in the children as the bio parent and b) the stepparent actively trying to undo the legacy a deceased parent left for the good of the kids. This woman wants to alter/decrease the benefit of the dead mom's money fot her DD and divert it to benefit her own future offspring. Talk about entitlement![/quote]

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