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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP - in a woman with a child - elementary school - and I AGREE with you. I consider myself to be well rounded and well read - I work and I contribute to the household. However I have seen that I've alway put my DD first and sometimes forget about my husbands needs. I think as a couple you have to still out each other first. DH needs to fulfill my needs and I his - life shouldn't revolve around our child only. I realized I was doing this and have tried to make a change. I think too many women do this - out their husbands second and make it all about the kids. We need to stop and think and realize that we have a partnership (this goes for men too). [/quote]

+1
DW here with 3 kids between 3-10 and working full time. No nanny so still do lots of house work. DH is very involved with the kids but I do most of the house work. I can confirm it is very hard to balance kids and romance/DH. For many years after giving birth, I loathed sex and I think he was so sad and even complained. I think for most men sex is everything. After reading a lot of threads to what extend men really wanted/value sex and for fear of him cheating, I started having more of it FOR HIM. I even pretended I was in, but wasn't there, I did for him, with no expectations (I had literally given up on us ever connecting). He could not connect with me emotionally to the level I desired and could not could not understand my emotional need which meant everything to me. On top of doing it for him, I also deliberately worked on my attitude, complained less and just did what I could. Surprisingly he is so much happier and started taking more interest in me and my emotional vacuum. I have also started liking the sex much more and our relationship has become much better. I think lack of sex was killing him and I am glad I started just by doing it for him.[/quote]

DW, you are inspiring. I'm a bachelor that's terrified of marriage because of the scenario you describe here. Unfortunately, I don't think most DWs are this self-aware and willing to do such a 180. [/quote]

If you are a bachelor forming impressions about "DWs" as a group, you probably shouldn't get married. [/quote]

I am a 33 year old man who has always envisioned himself getting married. However, as I've watched my friends marriages evolve I hear from my guy friends about the ways their DWs change, esp. as it relates to interest in sex. It almost always goes down and stays much lower. Why would anyone want any part of that?[/quote]

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