Reply to Husbands with SAHMs that prefer they work

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Plan ahead and do your homework, girls. Don't be like me and get stuck with a loser who can't afford to keep things a float and APPRECIATE a woman playing a traditional role, if that is what you want.

I regret marrying my husband every day. I thought I was marrying for love but I was just being an idiot. [/quote]

I bet he regrets marrying a leech. [/quote]

Or it could be a partnership where each spouse contributes different things?  Or maybe the husband doesn't solely judge his wife on her job or lack thereof?  Is being a sahm anymore of a leech than a child?[/quote]

A teenager does not need constant, one on one hands on care (barring special needs). [b]What exactly is the SAH spouse "contributing" at that point that equals an income that will benefit everyone?[/b] [/quote]

Cooking, cleaning, grocery shopping, laundry, gift buying/wrapping, home maintenance, etc. At that point its more like a homemaker.

Also, some of us are married to husbands who make so much that the incremental income we'd bring is not needed and would barely be noticed. Its not like we are living on credit card debt or skipping college/retirement savings for me to stay home. Quite the opposite.[/quote]

Gift buying and wrapping? This brings appreciable value to the home?[/quote]

To the home? No. To the marriage? Absolutely! All those "networking connections" need to be built and nurtured. This sort of social connection work is traditionally done by women, and rarely noticed by men. But yes, it matters. To the MIL who doesn't go off the rails because her son remembered her birthday/favorite flowers/etc. The promotion you get because wifey and your boss's wifey are friendly, if not "friends". The other at-home parents you can call to watch your kids or carpool or take the kids overnight in an emergency... These connections don't just magically appear (look at every other thread on here complaining about how nobody has time to make/keep friends anymore). Knowing someone well enough to choose a thoughtful gift, remembering an important occassion to give said gift, etc. is a skill, and it brings a tremendous advantage to those who have it (or have someone who has it keeping their calendar).[/quote]

It's already well established that you make friends with other SAHM b/c you have coffee and yoga with them daily -- most friendship is about proximity. It's not because you picked out a book off amazon that spoke to their soul. [/quote]

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