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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Does anyone think this might have been written by the SIL?

I don't understand how someone can be so self-absorbed and narcissistic as the OP (if real and as stated), that it seems like it *has* be be written by a troll, or a "from the other perspective" sort of approach.

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Nope, I'm betting it is legit.  My DH and I dealt with infertility for years, before finally conceiving our DD through IVF.  Unfortunately, I encountered quite a bit of thoughtlessness from several people, including close friends/family, during that time.  For some reason, people seem to have very little empathy for infertility.
I spent years putting on a brave face and hiding my true feelings.  "Sucking it up" to attend showers and visit new babies and their mothers, because these ladies were my friends, and, despite how painful it was to think I might never have a child, I wanted to be there for them.  It was isolating and heart-wrenching and a horribly painful experience.
You never truly know what someone else is going through.  Maybe that hospital visit or missed birthday party occurred just after the SIL experienced a miscarriage or received news that the latest treatment cycle didn't work or insurance coverage had fallen through, or any number of things.  I can remember walking out of a Starbuck's in tears on Mother's Day two years ago - the barista had wished me a Happy Mother's Day just a few days after our most recent cycle failure, and I just couldn't handle it any more.  I'm sure she thought I was crazy.[/quote]

NP, and I think people have very little empathy IN GENERAL.  
People go through many things - you may or may not be privy to their level of grief. I'ts better to assume there are things at play that you don't understand. 
I remember one very close friend of mine was totally MIA for 4 months when my first kid was born. Turns out she was actually going through a bad separation.
Another very close family friend skipped my wedding (called 2 days before to cancel). Turns out she had stage IV breast cancer. She died a few months later.

I cannot imagine the depth of pain your SIL must have been dealing with if she avoided birthday parties. Her childlessness must have been weighing on her 24-7.

Just be happy for her - genuinely happy for her - that she'll finally get to be a mother - as you have had the privilege and good fortune to be.  Because that's really what separates you and her thus far - bad luck.

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