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[quote=Anonymous]OP, this news is retriggering the trauma you experienced around your injury and perceived abandonment by your ex.  If you are honest with yourself, you may realize that you want to reach out because you are enamored with the idea that you could now connect with your ex in a slightly different way than he connects with his wife and other friends, because of your past experiences.  I am not saying you want a romantic relationship with him, but you want to believe that you are special to him in some enduring way.  I think this is because your subconscious wants to go back and heal the old feelings of abandonment and loss by reinventing the relationship in a new way.

This is not a healthy impulse.  Maybe the ex still has a place in his heart for you and maybe not, but he has clearly chosen to seal whatever is or was there away.  He doesn't want continuing contact.

The fact that he feels this way doesn't mean that your ongoing feelings, however unrequited, are inappropriate.  They are your feelings.  It just means that you need to find a way to deal with those feelings on your own.  Try trauma therapy.

If you are in DC, Linda Levine in Georgetown is good.[/quote]

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