Reply to Career or divorce

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Career or divorce"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It's clear to me that OP's concern career-wise isn't that there aren't firms in Dallas, it is that these firms might not hire *her* because she is pretty senior.  I don't know why the so called partners here are acting like that isn't a valid concern.  Many firms are not willing to just hire someone else's senior associate on the cusp of partnership.[/quote]

Sure it's a valid concern. Except she hasn't even bothered looking in Dallas and has already decided there's no jobs, guess she'll get a divorce and her kid can deal. She literally has not even tried to reach out and find something despite this not happening til what, next year, and she's already just made up her mind that nobody will hire her. It's her marriage and family on the line and she's just so ambivalent and disinterested in doing anything that betters that situation. [/quote]

Totally a valid concern. It is hard to get hired as a 8th yr or 10th yr or whatever OP is. That doesn't mean that no one EVER gets a job. OP is choosing not to even look. I have known senior lawyers who have sacrificed for their spouses -- in one case the spouse was a tenure track prof and was lucky to get a job anywhere so the DH followed her to Dallas; in another the spouse was a clinical psychologist again in a tight market so the spouse followed to Denver; in another case the spouse was an FBI agent who got transferred so the atty spouse had to find a job in Minneapolis. All of these attorney spouses were either 7th-8th yr associates or junior partners (without a book) and all were general litigators without any kind of hook. Pretty "impossible" odds re finding a job. Yet the attorney spouses ended up: in house for a major investment bank; at a regional Colorado firm for a yr which wasn't great but the spouse stuck it out for 12-14 months and then landed in house at a healthcare company in Denver; at a regional firm in Minneapolis, where the spouse eventually made partner, respectively.

There are things one can do if they WANT to make it work -- often it's not going to biglaw but to a regional firm that may be a little more flexible re seniority when it comes to hiring. Sometimes it's going to biglaw but letting the recruiter know that you will take a step back (or 2-3 yrs step back) if the firm doesn't want you as an 8th yr. Sometimes it's trying for in house or gov't, even if it means not the best in house or gov't gig. In smaller cities, sometimes just being in the city and working someplace for a yr or two opens up options that wouldn't exist if you're searching from DC. I know someone who went to a DOJ job in Georgia -- not the best job at all and not one known for good exit options. Yet 18 months later he got into a great southeastern firm -- a firm that had turned him down earlier bc they questioned whether he REALLY wanted to be in Georgia; once they saw he was living there for almost 2 yrs, practicing, and admitted to the bar, they were willing to pull the trigger.

Point is -- try to look before you decide it's truly impossible.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics