Reply to Update: New nephews not fitting into family dynamic

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I would be ridiculously offended if I married into a family and my kids weren't considered family. I think you're in the wrong.

Instead I think that when the kids are bad, you need to either take them outside or tell your new SIL that it's not okay. [/quote]

This situation is a rocky one.  The OP's BIL was a widower with three little girls when he remarried. The new SIL and her two boys were likely abused in a previous relationship(s).  They bought extra baggage into the new step family household.
 
The new SIL continues to ignore the fact that she and her boys need help.  Her new husband, the OP's BIL (the OP's brother's brother) is struggling with the fact that not only does everybody have to adjust to this new blended family, but that his new wife and step sons need intervention and that they are defiant against any corrections from anybody.

In addition, not only are the nearly teen boys oppositional, but they both are very overweight.  Family meals with extended family are a battle.

When the OP or others offer them healthier food options, similar things that the other kids eat, they throw temper tantrums or throw their food on the floor because they only want to eat fast food.  When these boys are encouraged to participate in outdoor activities with the other kids, they decline  always preferring to stay inside and sit and play with their electronics instead.  They don't want to socialize and are ill-mannered when they are forced to.[/quote]

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