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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm not sure if responders here are fully appreciating the extent if the medical problem in terms of kids. My best friend went through similar medical procedures. She was NOT advised not to try to have kids, but she was told that her cervix had been so shortened that she might never be able to carry a child to term. She had a miscarriage because of the problem, even after a circlage (sp?) was put in.  It was heartbreaking at the time. She did go on to have a successful pregnancy and was very lucky.

My friend is not very religious and was active during college, and his whole thing played havoc with her psyche.  She blamed herself and felt very slutty, though it was obviously wrong to feel this way, but when a woman can't have kids because of something sexual you have to understand it is bound to mess you up a little.

I think people are being very hard on OP. It is hard to make sense of sicknesses like this that mess with your reproductive abilities. If I were in OP's husband's position I'd want to apologize to my wife for possibly doing something that risked her health and her ability to have kids, even though I hadn't known at the time I was doing it. Just absolving yourself of any responsibility is hurtful and certainly doesn't help her heal.

But OP, if your husband can't give you the support you need -- if your feelings aren't important enough to him to make him change his behavior -- then yes I think your marriage is over. No sense spending your whole life with that person.  Good luck![/quote]

[b]The problem is that she's looking to blame him for the disease. And that's just not fair. It's common and honestly her purity on her wedding day has nothing to do with it. [/b]
Now, granted the DH isn't winning any compassion awards, but she's not going to be able to really communicate with him until she stops trying to blame him for the disease.[/quote]

How is it unfair? She did get it from him.  Yes, I know it's common. And my understanding is that there's really no way to determine if a man is carrying the HPV virus, but she's entitled to some sympathy from him.[/quote]

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