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Elementary School-Aged Kids
Reply to "Parents of middle school girls, please..."
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous] I'm the original PP on this post. I guess I don't understand what your and other posters are advocating: booty shorts on whomever wants to wear them? You don't show up to your first day of work in flip flops and cutoff shorts (unless you're working at the beach), so why should dressing for school be any different? Furthermore, even if a child isn't actively victimized, what merit is there in exposing your flesh? By no means am I a prude, but whenever I see a girl or woman wearing shorts that literally expose their buttcheeks, I'm wondering what the motivation is there. Adding two inches to them to the hem isn't "bowing to opressive patriarchal forces," it's presenting oneself decently.[/quote] What am I advocating is that you wear the clothes that you want to wear and find appropriate, and let other people do the same. If somebody wears clothes to school that violate the dress code, that's their concern and the school's concern, not yours. And if you want to know why a girl/woman wears shorts you find too short, you should ask her. Maybe she'll answer your question. Maybe she'll tell you it's none of your business.[/quote] Of course it's none of my business, but I struggle to understand how someone would be comfortable like that. School is an environment for learning - it's not a party or a time to "hang out." I believe students and teachers should dress accordingly.[/quote] I struggle to understand how people are comfortable in lots of different outfits, but that doesn't invalidate the fact that they are. Only the one wearing the clothes makes much sense to me to decide what clothes are worn. Yes, school is an environment for learning. And, like all other things, I think people are likely to do best when they're as comfortable as possible within the constraints of the rules. [b]Whatever permitted clothing my child feels comfortable, happy, and confident in is fine by me.[/b] She mixes it up pretty frequently depending on the day, her schedule, and her mood. Not sure how someone else's clothing should matter to what a student does at school...and if my child's clothing causes her a distraction that's a matter for me, her, and her teacher to sort out.[/quote] No matter what? I don't understand this. I thought our job as adults is to guide our children, even if it means imposing rules that they don't like if it's in their best interest. And, yes, I think prohibiting booty shorts for tween girls is in their best interest. I think you're being unrealistically idealistic. If a boy wore a shirt to school featuring a graphic of a woman in a string bikini, I would think (a) that it's sexist and (b) that it's distracting to other students. What do you think?[/quote] We have a different idea of what is in our child's best interest, that's all. Once they are past the toddler/preschool stage, I think it's their right to choose their clothing unless there's a safety issue. I absolutely give them the info about society having an idea of what clothes are appropriate for what places or activities, and why, and the implications of choosing to go against that. I think usually parents have greater wisdom and understanding of the world due to their life experience, and they should absolutely share that with their kids for their benefit so the kids are making informed choices. What I don't do, though, is insist they conform to societal standards on their clothing choice other than to follow rules where dress codes exist. I see no value in it, no necessity in it, and no moral imperative in it, whereas I do see potential harm in doing so. A graphic of someone else, I might find sexist depending. I would probably think it was sexist if someone of any gender showed up wearing a graphic of someone else dressed in a stereotypical and revealing way. But I wouldn't find anything wrong with an individual person deciding to dress themselves any way they want...because that's a choice made only for them and doesn't seem to me to risk objectifying anyone like a shirt graphic of someone else might.[/quote] Okay. I admire how thoroughly you've examined your approach to parenting, but we obviously disagree. Agree to disagree! Something DCUM (and DC in general) would benefit from. :)[/quote] Sounds good to me, thanks for the civil (and interesting) discussion. :)[/quote]
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