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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don't get all the disdain for OP. It sounds like her husband appreciates what she does for the family, but has trouble staying with the program.

But as for the program, OP, you need to find some common ground. Like set clear savings goals, regular evaluations of your retirements, etc, but don't make it a daily battle. Don't meet the monthly goal and then try to save some more. Don't incessantly harp on how much things cost. If giving your H a set amount of money to blow through every week or month without reservation helps, then do that. Just make sure to set goals that you both agree on.

Also take a good look at yourself. It sounds like you have your stuff together, but some people can never get over an impoverished childhood. My stepmother was a wartime refugee and she hoards canned goods and slips rolls into her purse at buffets. She can't help herself. My best friend also worries continually about money and would freak out when contractors came over to start home improvements that she and her husband had already agreed on and budgeted for. Both of those women could have benefitted from some counseling (one did get counseling and medication and it helped a lot.)

GL[/quote]

OP here, this post is very helpful.  Thanks.  I am not at the point of needing therapy, though I have relatives who are as you describe.  Poverty can be very traumatic.  I am going to go with the pocket money idea.  It is a great one.[/quote]

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