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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]

OP here.  Can you explain the bold part a bit more?  I'm struggling to understand what that means.[/quote]

I can only speak about my family dynamic, but I was brought up to believe that "authentic" relationships were ones where you had a lot of crying and fighting and emotional turmoil. Sound crazy? It was.

Every time I would have a real knock down drag out with one of my parents, it would end with them hugging and kissing me, really happy "we had had this talk" and don't we all just feel so much better and closer now? Uh, no. I felt emotionally wrecked, but I was brought up to understand this was a necessary struggle you had to have with people to be truly close to them, and relationships that had not been tested by fire were some how shallow and fake.

Literally one parent would hit me and then when I cried pull me close and comfort me and tell me how much I was loved and why did I always have to push things so far, ha ha ha, c'mon smile, you know I love you. That sort of thing. Just typing this makes my stomach clench. By the time I was in HS I was neck-deep in drama.[/quote]

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