Reply to Am i wrong for being angry DH wants to change careers?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP: he would be absolutely miserable with a full retirement and says that he doesn't want to be one of those people who retire and then worry for years about running out of money.  My concern is how viable a late 50's career change is.  He tells me that it is taking his existing skills to a new direction, but he spent years building an education and experience for this?  it worries me because he earns 90% of the household income.  Our child at home worships him and I don't want[b] to see the last 1 1/2 years at home ruined by a father who is too busy.[/quote][/b]

Oh come the fuck on OP!! How many kids that age want to be up under their parent all the time? Your husband is not just up and quitting his job, he's trying to set himself up for a successful post- retirement career. Doesn't matter if YOU think a late 50's career change is viable or not- he gets to try. I can't believe you are going to try to piss all over this man's retirement. You must've been a nightmare all of these years. I know one change your husband should definitely make in his retirement. And it's not career related...
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Agreed with the post except the last statement.  I've been working since I was 14 and I sometimes think that I would like the experience being my own boss at some point in life before I die. Of course, I put aside those dreams and make sure financially we can afford the things DH and I agreed on (I.e. Small house close-in versus less expensive house with a further commute) and we both have jobs with flexibility so kids can participate in activities and one of us can make events during the school day. I imagine if I were in my early 50's and had been working almost 35+ years, with 25 of those where work decisions were not just my own and finally want to do something that makes me happy, doesn't uproot anyone and we can still support financial committments like mortgage, food etc, I would be upset if my spouse was not supportive. Even more upset if my spouse made a career decision like staying at home or going back to grad school that I supported, and when I went to do the same at 50 with a high schooler (1-2 years left) , oh no, you need to be the work horse and keep going in this path till you retire or die.   IMHO, you are wrong for being angry that DH wants to change careers. Would it have better if he did this when your kids were young so it was more "viable"?  He tried to do the right thing and keep things stable for years at the expense of what he may have wanted and now you will say he is too old to try to do it.  BTW, just had a conversation with DH about people that have successfully  started companies in their early 50's after retirement from 30 years in a stable job but with the type of connections to branch out.

At work, we learned about LCS, stating likes, concerns, and suggestions so you don't come off as being unsupportive and always shooting down ideas for change because you are fearful of XYZ.  What do you like about DH's plan, that it's well thought out, that he is taking steps to be happy in career.  Concerns are income, can you meet bills, do you need to cut back certain places , would it help if you brought in more income and could you still do so with someone being around for the high schooler?  If he is busier maybe it isn't dinner every night with the family but maybe he can commit to 3 nights a week. How does it impact retirement and college for high schooler?  If your concerns could be issues, I.e. Dip in anility to save for retirement, is there a solution like you put away more in retirement and/or increase hours?  Focus on how to make it work knowing it may mean changes for you instead of why it won't work or he is foolish for trying this.[/quote]

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