Reply to Popcorn Problem: how could this have been handled better?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Not excusing DW's reaction which is clearly over the top, but agree with others that taking DW to the brink of the looney bin took time and I believe that DH is responsible for taking her there.

Her words indicate to me that in her ind DH rarely if ever takes the initiative to do anything to contribute to the family unit. I'm sure that when he says "we" do this and that about taking care of the kids that it is really her doing it and him watching and waiting for her to get done with it.

DW knows she should be constructive and that DH can't read her mind, although it's painfully obvious that he should get off his butt and help out. So, she tells him what to do. She's been doing this more and more lately.

At the same time she tells him what to do, she is thinking in her own mind that DH is going to take the easy way out and just sweep the popocord to the side. DW feels overworked and underappreciated, particularly by clueless DH, so that when DH does what she expected, she blows up.

How much harder is it to simply sweep up the popcorn into a bag and throw it away so that it is out of sight? Really, it's almost like you do it to spite her. Also, if there are any rats or ants as a result of the popcorn you left there, I'm sure it will be up to DW to take care of that too. So in a way, you are just leaving the mess there for her to clean up later. Way to go!

OP - if you are going to ask her to apologize, you better join that up with some talking points on how you are going to shape up your own act and be a better life partner. [/quote]

You are good!  You got ALL of that from his initial post.

That's an awful ot of added facts to justify DW's behavior.   I am encouraged though.  Most of the women responding did not go the "DW is always justified in her actions" route.  [/quote]

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