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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP again.  I made an appointment with a lawyer.  We are not trying mediation exactly.  We will have our own lawyers but they agree to work together. We sign contracts to the effect that if it takes an ugly turn they can not represent us at a trial.  DH insists that should his lawyer tell him he is dreaming that he will trust it.  We'll see I guess.  I told him that I would probably running  our agreement by a regular divorce attorney, and that he can  do the same.[/quote]

What do you mean that you are using lawyers but will run any potential agreement by a "regular divorce attorney".  Please make sure the lawyer(s) you are using are practiced family law attorneys that regularly deal with divorce.  There are many, many different details to take are of in splitting debt, assets, home, custody and retirement funds.  Only someone who deals with these issues on a regular basis will know all the details that need to be tied up.

Do not just use any old attorney.  It has to be someone with experience in this practice area.  They don't necessarily need to be divorce litigation specialists (i.e. the kind of divorce attorneys that regularly expect to end up in disputes in court), but you do need to use someone who has extensive experience with divorce.

Just like you wouldn't necessarily use a family doctor for kidney disease, similarly it's not just any old lawyer who can competently handle divorce.  [/quote]

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