Reply to Depressed over lifestyle

Forum Index » Money and Finances

Reply to "Depressed over lifestyle"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Two things OP, one, I dont think you are terrible for feeling this way.  You wanted a certain lifestyle, perhaps similar to how you grew up, and you thought you had done all the right things to end up with that lifestyle, then the bottom fell out.  That sucks.  I would feel the exact same way that you do.  This isnt about other people who only make whatever your new HHI is, its about what YOU thought and wanted as your life.  It sucks, no other way to say it, and I really do feel for you.  That is a huge drop in HHI and SES; an entirely different life altogether.  When you are done mourning (and that is what this sadness is) and ready to face the world again, start trying to figure out a new way to achieve what you want.  It may be different jobs or even different careers for you and DH or maybe a move or starting a side business.

Now, all that said, I hope you think about the bigger picture here.  Please, OP, encourage your daughter not to rely on her SES status and HHI to be soley the result of her husband's career and income.  That is a very dangerous trap that women have fallen into for generations.  That is why women usually end up with the proverbial short end of the stick in a divorce.  It is why I would never be content as a full time SAHM.  I grew up in a home with two married conventional parents.  My mom, while an ivy league grad, stayed home once my brother and I were born and my dad was in charge of all their finances.  Frankly, now that they are elderly, I dont think my mom has clue what their personal finances look like.  That scares the crap out of me.  I will not be that wife, that mom, that woman.  Its the bigger picture here in my mind, OP.

Good luck.[/quote]

The fact that your mother doesn't understand their finances has nothing to do with not working. She chose to stick her head in the sand. I am a SAHM and I am certain that I have a much better understanding of our finances than my husband. In the event of my death, I have left him the passwords to my spreadsheets and financial models so that he understands where everything is, as well as contact info for our accountant, estate lawyer and banker. Being a SAHM doesn't necessarily mean being out of the loop. If you are that kind of SAHM, well, shame on you. That seems quite dumb. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics