Reply to If you decided your husband was no longer "winner" material, would you divorce him?

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Reply to "If you decided your husband was no longer "winner" material, would you divorce him?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This happened to me, the morphing of a 'winner' into a beta that had setback after setback.   Over the course of 15 years or so.

I was prepared to stick it out, come whatever may, because I actually believed in the vows I took.   Call me old-fashioned. Also, a change in health status seemed to play a part, and I felt bad for him.  Still, it was really hard to watch a C-level guy with so. much. potential. slip into a professional near-failure.  But I kept silent and was supportive, helpful, and tried to be kind.

Here's the weird part:  he turned on ME.  Everything that happened to him, it turns out, was my fault.  I wasn't an enthusiastic enough sex partner.  I didn't spend enough time on my appearance.  I didn't contribute enough to the HHI.  I was "lazy." I was a hick.  I was pedantic.  I was negative.  I was fat.  I was entitled.  My family was stupid and fat and entitled.

So, we went our separate ways.   My compassion and support is completely gone, as you might suspect.[/quote]

This is interesting and worthy of a separate thread.  People you coddle, put up with, etc…and in the end they dump YOU.  I had this happen with a longtime girlfriend (from high school through my late 30s).  Super-high-maintenance.  Was such an eye-opener when after years of placating her and dealing with her paranoias and moods, that she dumped me.

I had an aunt who was married to a man who did EVERYTHING for her.  She sat around and whined, basically.  He dropped dead about 6 years ago while carrying her suitcases.  About two years ago, she was visiting, and unleashed a torrent of anger about "how dare he die on her" and how she hated him for that.  Just couldn't believe my ears; no gratitude for the years of his service; just hostility that the service was stopped.[/quote]

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