Reply to Best schools to escape the drug and alcohol culture

Forum Index » Private & Independent Schools

Reply to "Best schools to escape the drug and alcohol culture"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This is why my kids are going to go to a high school where many of the students are economically disadvantaged. There's no money for drugs and alcohol. Most of the students have jobs after school and on the weekends so they can help support their families. I'm not saying there's no drugs or alcohol, there's just a lot less.

Our kids will also have jobs in high school.

My husband and I both attended elite private schools (in the northeast) so we are no strangers to the culture. I was handed everything by my parents and so was my brother.my brother still lives near my dad. He has drug and alcohol problems and works part-time delivering pizzas because my dad still gives him money, etc. I made much better choices than my brother but I was still a spoiled brat. I'm not repeating history. [/quote]

Drug and alcohol abuse is far more prevalent among the "economically disadvantaged."  It may well be a reason many families are "economically disadvantaged."[/quote]

This is not true. Abuse is far more prevalent in "economically disadvantaged" adults, but abuse is far more prevalent in "rich" kids.

http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/201310/the-problem-rich-kids (Exerpts are in quotes.... of course I chose my quotes so you may garner a different take reading the whole article)

It's a long article but it states:

"These are young people from communities dominated by white-collar, well-educated parents. They attend schools distinguished by rich academic curricula, high standardized test scores, and diverse extracurricular opportunities. The parents' annual income, at $150,000 and more, is well over twice the national average. And yet they show serious levels of maladjustment as teens, displaying problems that tend to get worse as they approach college."

It comes down to the parents and the culture at some schools. I have even seen the "work hard, play hard" quote from posters on this board trying to explain away why many Ivy league schools have a drinking and drug problem.

"The children of affluent parents expect to excel at school and in multiple extracurriculars and also in their social lives. They feel a relentless sense of pressure that plays out in excessive substance use; as the kids stoutly proclaim, "We work hard—and we play hard!" It plays out in crippling anxiety and depression, about anticipated or perceived achievement "failures." It plays out in random acts of delinquency—stealing from a friend, shoplifting, defacing property."

I see this in one of my own child. It bothers me a lot.

"By middle school, these youths come to believe there is one path to ultimate happiness—having money—which in turn requires attending a prestigious college. They grow preoccupied with becoming highly marketable commodities, pursuing activities chiefly if they will look good on resumes."

But as the PP said the parent is the safe haven. I agree, but we can also be the problem. I think it is why many of us are looking or a "less competitive" school. My children were volunteering and the coordinator was obsessed with signing our forms so we can "get credit". I explained we did not need to "get credit" but she started to go on about national honor society or something needing this documented. We just wanted to volunteer, not join the national honor society. But I have to tell you, sadly, in the back of my head, I thought - okay I might want to document this. :-(

"It's important to note that adult criticism is not annulled by attention or even affection. Parents might think it's okay to keep the pressure on because they eat dinner together and attend all their children's athletic events and performances. But such positive gestures do not cancel out criticism. Psychologists have firmly established that disparaging words or attitudes have a much stronger impact than words of praise—by at least a factor of three."

I learned this when I was a manger of a high stress customer service department. For  each customer that went off on one of my employees it took 10 fold to undo that criticism.

I don't know if I have the answer, or you have the answer. But we all know it is a problem.

[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics