Reply to I just don't like my husband anymore

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]In hindsight, I think I married too early. I married the perfect guy on paper. All my mom's friends are envious that I married so well. He loved me so much. [/quote]

I'm a guy, divorced now remarried, and this modus operandi (quoted above) is what used to make my blood boil about so many women I was interested in who were of child-bearing age.

It's not marrying too young, it's marrying for all the wrong reasons.  Marrying for the resume, marrying for the paycheck and lifestyle; marrying for the prestige.  Not because you like the actual person, but because he meets a checklist and will gain the approval of friends (even worse: your mother's friends! WTF?!?!?! What do you care what your [i]mother's friends[/i] think?).

Here's a little thought exercise: reflect on the men who resort to mail-order brides from the 3rd world where they can find a "nice traditional young woman not corrupted by feminism"...that's the male parallel.

I used to avoid women under 35 for this reason, because of this shallow shitty thinking.  Women are generally, suddenly full of a lot less shit when their prospects of getting pregnant are over.   Ultimately, I wanted a family and had to negotiate this minefield, but by then was older and wiser.

Seriously: a happy life is not some mailorder shit you pick out of a catalog where suddenly if you choose the right guy, have the right number of kids, house in the right neighborhood or school district, etc., you will be happy.  Like the others have said: figure out what you want and let your husband know.  Now that you're in it, you should let him know so he at least gets a shot at delivering it.  If not, then just accept the relationship is the business contract/agreement you selected and both of you find "friends" to get your emotional needs met elsewhere.

On a less vitriolic note: OP, I think the others who advise counseling for depression are giving you some great advice.  You might find that a lot of this is due to being miserable and in a funk - he is just the convenient target.  The real answer to being happy for all of us is making ourselves happy, you can't get that from another person - there is no soulmate or prince charming who can "make you happy" - you have to make yourself happy.  Good luck to you.[/quote]

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