Reply to I have a sexless and loveless marriage. Ask me anything

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[quote=Anonymous]oh man. i am so in this boat too. i honestly can't remember the last time we had sex... i think maybe 4 times in the past year? if that. we get along well enough but my attraction for H is pretty much gone. i'm 99% sure that if we didn't have our amazing 3yo daughter i would have left him by now. i have learned that he is not the right kind of partner for me and i will never have the life i thought (took for granted) i would have as a grown-up, with him. i oscillate between trying to be zen and at peace with the good things we have in our life together ("choosing my choice") and wondering whether/when i'm going to call it quits. i can't wrap my brain around the logistics of a divorce though, and i know that once i start researching it i'll start to feel like it's inevitable. i think about having an affair all the time.

OP (if you're still checking this thread) and others in this sad boat -- do you feel like you're keeping a running stay/go pro/con list in your head all the time? are there times when you seriously think you might blurt out "i don't know why, but that's it" -? this is my reality, more often than not. it's so unhealthy. [/quote]

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