Reply to How to handle separation from a man I’m attached to?

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Reply to "How to handle separation from a man I’m attached to?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You need help OP.[/quote]
The thing is that I’ve always been like this. When I was very young (16-20), I met with my boyfriends daily. It was so natural for both of us to see each other every day after school/work. Then I had a couple of relationships where men weren’t even in touch daily and appeared/disappeared as they wished, and I suffered so much that I married my husband just to avoid that pain.

Maybe I just need a man who wants to meet nearly daily too or just suffer through a few months with my boyfriend until we naturally decide to move in together. [/quote]

OP, I think having the butterflies and the intense chemistry can be exhilarating in an early relationship and it can cause anxiety when you are still getting to know the person.  The anxiety calms when you are with them and it gets worse when you aren't together.  People with anxious attachment disorder feel this type of anxiety much more intense than others.  I suspect that you have anxious attachment and I would suggest that you get into therapy and perhaps CBT so that you can learn skills on how to manage these thoughts and feelings when they come up.  [/quote]
I think you’re right. I’m very calm when I’m with him, all the difficulties start when we are apart. Just need the time and energy to find a therapist. [/quote]

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