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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP. This is not your problem to solve. This is his problem and his new wife's problem. She will probably stick the baby in a car seat and drive the kids himself. Let her be how he "works it out." Not your job.

And no, do not give him every weekend. Then they won't get to see their friends, go to activities, etc.[/quote]

What? This is not his new wife's problem. Stop, encouraging taking advantage of her.[/quote]

It's definitely her problem because she chose to marry a man who shirks his parenting responsibilities. [/quote]

No, it's not. She's not the parent. She doesn't have to do the work of her lackluster, husband. Put yourself in her shoes, doing this for him would just incentivize him to continue this way, and she'll end up having to do all the parenting, which hurts everyone involved. These kids have two parents who need to figure this out.[/quote]

I mean, if I were entering a relationship with someone who had kids, I would absolutely expect to take on some responsibilities associated with those kids.[/quote]

Absolutely. But I've seen this go bad so many times. She's going to resent it. She's going to think it's bad for the baby's nap. She's going to be upset that she's not having the idyllic infancy period that first children in intact families get. She's going to be upset that it's not the first baby experience for him like it is for her. And she will take that out on her stepkids and gradually edge them further and further out. And that won't be hard to do, because her new boyfriend already ditched them and moved away and now doesn't want to do his parenting work. She won't want them every weekend.

So, OP, you need to protect your kids and yourself. Not by picking up his slack-- quite the opposite! Stand up for their right to be cared for by their father, and your right to not burn out by being an unpaid babysitter on his custody time. Being divorced from a lazy parent is a long haul and if you continue with this level of desire to protect the kids from minor stuff and willingness to pick up his slack for free you will burn out. Let him fail, document, and then you can get more child support. [/quote]

It’s not the girlfriend’s responsibility.  It is mom and dads.  He has to work.  [/quote]

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