Reply to Hosting Wife's College Friend's Daughter

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It's always interesting to hear different perspectives.  For me, this would be a no brainer--of course she could stay with me and I would not expect compensation.

I have a tight circle of friends.  I know their kids.  Heck, I'm the emergency contact for some of them.  I can't imagine saying no to a 22 yr old or an old friend.[/quote]

I mean, congrats for being rich?

My budget doesn't afford feeding an adult for three months, or for paying for their hot water, their electricty, their dishwashing detergent, their ....[/quote]

Financial constraints are absolutely a valid reason to decline.

OP, however, didn't mention any of them.  He just said, "I don't want the inconvenience."  That is mind boggling to me, when discussing a close friend's kid.  [/quote]

It’s mind-boggling to not want to host a 20-yo for three months who’s known to be a partier whose parents didn’t even feign politeness by offering a whiff of compensation, home/vacay swap, or other idea? Sorry you can’t see others’ perspectives. Feel free to run a free boarding house, that’s on you. But to imply that OP is some kind of jerk for not being A-ok with this plan is nuts. [/quote]

I'm sorry, apparently I was unclear.  I didn't mean to imply that OP was a jerk.  I wanted to convey explicitly and without equivocation that OP is a jerk for not wanting to do this because of the "inconvenience."  Apparently I am an anomaly (as is my wife) but we'd happily undertake a minor inconvenience for the kid of a close friend.  I've previously said that there are valid reasons to reject this request, including financial, lack of space, and others.  But OP's reasons are, "it would be inconvenient, my parents might want to use the room, the kid like to go out (and so what?), and I'm annoyed that they didn't offer to give us a week in Vail in return."

This isn't a business transaction, it's a favor that people do for friends.  I'd be offended if a friend offered me compensation for this.  But it's a virtual certainty that they would do something to show their appreciation.  [/quote]

Ditto. Some people have manners, some people are kind and generous to their friends. Many people are not I guess. We live in a sad selfish society, judging by DCUM.

I would take in this kid, and so would my dh. No brainer. [/quote]

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