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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP - Khan Academy is free and is entirely adequate for SAT/ACT prep.  Share the wisdom.[/quote]

I am aware of this, but my niece needs in person Support for test prep, which is why I offered. Self study isn't the best option for her. [/quote]

OP- You seem like someone who overfunctions and stabilizes your family.

It’s not your job to be your niece’s parent or your sister’s parent or your mom’s parent. You’ve probably received praise for being strong, smart, kind since you were a child (possibly taking on an emotional load or tasks as a child that were not are appropriate), which has come at the cost of self-abnegation. My guess is once you stop providing support you are treated as selfish and ungrateful. Even when other people take care of you, it’s wrapped in you taking care of you à la a new computer that you must pay back. There are no boundaries if you are expected to provide your salary. There may also be triangulation (you don’t help sister and she calls mom or vice versa), which keeps you stuck. This is dysfunctional and it’s not your fault and you can’t fix it. You can stop playing the role of family fixer.

The facts: You have a chronic illness, you have lost multiple jobs in as many years, and you have student loans as well as cc debt. The path you are on is not sustainable.

Your future:

Family Dysfunction and Health: If your current or future employer has an employee assistance program (free therapy, usually 5 sessions are free) you should use it. Talk to a third party about this with the goal to create better boundaries. You must take care of yourself mentally and physically, which means you can’t act as a parent to other adults.

SAT prep: your sister’s daughter: there may be some tuition remission programs for lower income kids. Look at those programs. Set a limit on what you can practically spend and stick to it. If other children need SAT prep your sister and mom can cover it in the future. And please pay the program directly like someone suggested.

Finances: This needs attention. Track your weekly and monthly spend as well as your annual spend from last year. See what you spend on and what you can cut or swap to save money. Create buckets for groceries and different spend items for the year, so you know what you can spend weekly and monthly. Pay down your highest interest credit card first and figure out how much you can pay towards then while paying at least the minimum on your student loans and funding your 401K to get at least some of your employer match. You must prioritize. You cannot go on vacation, buy new clothes, pay for SAT prep, live with no roommates, pay your mom for the computer, fund your retirement in a serious way, and pay off credit card debt at the same time. When will you pay off your cc debt? Set a goal. And figure out how much you need to pay every month to reach the goal. When you pay off your cc debt put the money towards your 401K and your highest interest student loan if you have multiple. When will you pay off your student loans? Set a goal. How much do you need to pay off annually and monthly to reach that goal?

If living alone is really important to you then that is your big me item. Not vacations and clothes and presents for your family.

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