Reply to Prenup Situation - how to move forward?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This marriage seems to be in trouble already based on your description. We are leaving our child mid-eight figures (as you would describe it). You can bet there will be a prenup.

If I were in DD’s parent’s shoes, I would probably agree to fund grandchildren’s education and chip in on a house but insist on a prenup.[/quote]

Genuinely curious.  How do parents get to insist on a prenup for their adult children?[/quote]

I imagine that the parents still have a lot of control over the trust. There are few people who would give up that income to prove a point.

[/quote]

I’m sure, but it seems like such a terrible foundation for an adult relationship with your children.  Yikes.[/quote]

Not really.  It's pretty standard for parents to want to continue protecting their children, including the money they give them from a future divorce.  This probably comes up in 98% of estate planning discussions with lawyers involved. [/quote].

I understand why people are worried about this.  I am more bewildered at the idea that there are so many (?) people out there who would insist on this rather than letting their adult children ultimately make their own decisions.[/quote]

So imagine going through hell and back like Cassie Ventura or some investment banker who worked 100 hour weeks and watched their coworker die from stress . Will you leave it up to your child to decide how your money is spent? The adult children are not forced to take the money. It makes sense from the donor's perspective, and it may make sense from the beneficiary's perspective. The spouse of the beneficiary has to make sure it makes sense from their perspective.

However, if I were in OP's shoes and my gf/fiancé did not at least suggest an option that protected me somehow, I wouldn't bother. Don't marry someone who will not think of how they can pelrotect you while protecting themselves. It's selfish, and they will continue to be selfish throughout the marriage.[/quote]

I hear what you’re saying.  My perspective is that I’m skeptical of money from parents that comes with strings.  In my experience those relationships have issues.

But I’m digressing there and anyway I agree with your next point.[/quote]

Strings like a prenup?  As suggested above, the prenup is belt-and-suspenders. You're not getting access to your spouse's family money either way.  It would be crazy not to include protetions against a possible divorce when giving your kids money. Who wants their life's work going to their kid's future exhusband? [/quote]

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