Reply to SN/Gifted DD accused of cheating -- legal rights?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote]Your DD didn’t misunderstand the directions.

She understood them just fine. She understood that she didn’t have the right calculator so she came up with a crafty solution. Her line of thinking was pretty much consistent with a typical middle school student who forgot the right calculator and was hoping to get away with using a different one.

I give her credit for the creative idea but I think in general students at that age could easily think it was reasonable to do what she did. In fact, I think a peer review would be much easier on her than an adult review.[/quote]
Finally!  I was reading this thread, wondering if no one else was going to point this out.  This is not literal or linear thinking, this is not misunderstanding the instructions – this is an 8th grader forgetting the right calculator, and concocting a rationale for using the wrong one, knowing that it WAS the wrong one.

Some other points:

For those of you who say that the OP and her daughter are willing to accept the consequences of her actions, that’s just not true.  The peer review panel is PART of the consequences.  Whether you agree with it or not, (and while I don’t love it, I don’t think it’s the middle school equivalent of waterboarding that OP and some of the more hysterical PPs believe it to be), the school has determined that the peer panel is (i) part of the consequences for the offender, and (ii) a valuable learning tool for the rest of the students.  Presumably OP knew about this beforehand; complaining about it now is absurd.

OP, to suggest that the right to privacy regarding your daughter’s “condition” is implicated here is ridiculous.  The panel won’t know a thing about her “issues” unless she chooses to disclose them.  (Or unless you insist on making a federal case out of it.)  Period.  As another PP has said, she has a compelling story to tell:  she forgot the correct calculator, she thought she’d be OK using the incorrect one if she didn't used the forbidden functions, she didn't use the forbidden functions (as evidenced by certain incorrect answers that would have been different if she HAD used the forbidden functions) – she may have made a mistake, but she didn't cheat.  There’s no need to get into her “special needs” at all.

The fact that your daughter will be nervous going in front of the peer review panel has no bearing on whether she should or not.  All kids would be nervous.  Your description of the lifelong scars you claim this would cause is pretty out there.

Others may not feel this way, but you come across as a mother who wants to shield her daughter from the clearly laid-out consequences of her actions, which you both concede were violations of the rules for the test.  Wouldn’t a better message be, “Honey, I know you misunderstood, but you broke the rules.  This panel is part of the consequences.  Let’s discuss how you’re going to explain your mistake.”  Deciding on your own that she WILL NOT participate sends a terrible message to her.  My 6 yo used to (and still does sometimes) believe that is she does something wrong, and says it’s an accident, that means it’s OK.  That’s age appropriate behavior for her, but we have tried very hard to teach her that even though something is an accident, that doesn’t mean it doesn’t have consequences.  You’re doing a 13 yo no favors by telling her exactly the opposite – “well, since you misunderstood (which is BS, but whatever), you shouldn’t have to suffer the consequences of your actions that will suffer you distress.”
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