Reply to SN/Gifted DD accused of cheating -- legal rights?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I have a few strategic ideas.

If your daughter sees a therapist, perhaps that therapist can persuade the principal.  The LD person on staff at the school might be an advocate for you as well.  If not, is there a headmaster who can overrule the principal?  Finally, the school will have a board of directors.  Go them, explain the situation concisely, and ask for their help.

One last hope might be to ask the principal to defer the tribunal while you document your daughter's disabilities and establish the appropriate accommodations.

If you strike out on all of the above, I agree with your refusal to allow her to appear at the peer tribunal.

The logistics of refusing to attend will be challenging.  The tribunal would probably occur during school hours and it would be difficult for your daughter to physically refuse to attend if she were summoned.  So you would have to tell the principal in advance, and in writing, that you explictly do not consent to this.  You may have to withdraw her from school to avoid it.  Only you know if that would be worth it.  I know some situations in which it would be, and some in which it would not be.  It depends on your kid.  If her emotions really can't sustain it, then move her now.

It sounds like you are not in DC.  It may be worthwhile to find an educational attorney to advise you.  If nothing else, you may want help in negotiating return of the balance of the year's tuition if you withdraw your daughter.

I feel for you, and your daughter.  You both acknowledge the mistake and aren't trying to get out of appropriate consequences, but this peer review thing is inappropriate.[/quote]

I am 17:29.  I think this poster has some xlnt ideas about how to handle the situation at a private school (I posted about the public school process not knowing at the time that OP was in private).  I just wanted to add that it is entirely likely that if you and daughter do not show up for the Draconian panel that she will be expelled.  You must be prepared for this.  Also, if expelled, you can't ask for any tuition refund because you failed to comply with the school's procedural rules.  I have no idea what private you are in - some boards support their principals 100% and look the other way; other boards might take action.  I like the idea of taking it up to the Board but really can't make the call whether to do it now or after you refuse to go to the panel.  Only you know the politics in your school.  It could backfire on you.

Do you think they want you gone?  My gut is telling me that you have been marked as a "difficult mom" or the child has been so labeled - and that the school is really telling you that it is time to leave.  Does that sound spot on?  If so, again, my advice is to move her out ASAP.  To another private or to public or homeschooling.  Try to get a confidentiality agreement; I imagine the school has one or more already on file BUT READ THE LANGUAGE BECAUSE IT WILL FAVOR THE SCHOOL'S POSITION, so you can avoid a lawyer.   Are you local?  The only privates I can think of that might take a SN child mid-term is The McLean School in Potomac or Commonwealth Academy in Alexandria.  But both are very very picky about who they take.  McLean is much larger than Commonwealth Academy.  Both take children with minor learning issues.  They do not take behavioral problems which is why I think you need the confidentiality agreement.  You won't get in if your principal says your child cheats or is dishonest.  Wow.  Good luck.  Please post to let us all know what happened.  Praying for a happy ending.  Ours was.[/quote]

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