Reply to Been divorced 5 years; ex sent text last night expressing regret

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My ex began an affair in another state while traveling for work, I found out, and filed for divorce. He did not want the divorce, but I was done. I offered to attend marriage counseling and he declined, so I told him I could not stay married after his infidelity and filed.

He moved to the affair state with his AP while I stayed where we had been living with our kid. The divorce took about 2 years. We had been married 25 years. I have not spoken to him or contacted him at all, after the divorce was finalized. He has remarried his AP and I have assumed they were happy, etc.

He pays alimony and cs, and has cut off all communication with our kid. Kid is in therapy, confused, sad. I feel terrible for our child but I have been helping them handle their father’s absence as much as I can. I offered time and time again to help facilitate the relationship between dad and child, to the point the therapist said please stop, it’s not going to happen, your ex is completely checked out of kid’s life.

So we have rebuilt our lives. It’s going ok.

Last night, around 10 pm, I received an obviously drunken text from ex. He expressed regret and said he felt pain like no other over what he has done. He said he had no excuse for his actions and was sorry. He said he wishes he could talk to me and thinks about us all the time.

I don’t plan on responding. [b]I am going to show my kid’s therapist the text and ask her to discuss the issue with my child. I want a professional to help my child navigate their feelings and emotions and possible actions (ie, contacting their dad and expressing themselves to him in any way they feel comfortable) they could make in response to the text.[/b]

That being said: what would you do in response to this text.

[/quote]

You should ignore your ex. Don’t respond to that message.

However, you are handling the situation with your child badly.
Your responsibility as a parent is to talk to your child. You cannot outsource parenting to a therapist. 
You must talk about it with your child. 
[/quote]

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