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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]We both work from home and I LOVE putting "yoga" or "gym class" or emojis or something else silly on our joint calendar in the middle of the day. Sometimes it can just be chat about the day sex. It doesn't have to be that serious. [/quote]

Thanks for sharing—great ideas. Given that my wife low libido, isn’t interested in anything beyond the most basic physical intimacy, and doesn’t think she’s ever had an orgasm, I’m wondering: is there anything you’d suggest doing differently to help increase her interest or engagement?
[/quote]

I don't think I have ever had an orgasm either and I don't really have much sex drive. I am happy to have sex with DH a couple times a week, just like I would be happy to give him a back rub or make him a sandwich, but it makes it hard for me when he's like, "what are you thinking about?" "what do you want to do?" or "what is your fantasy" - that puts too much pressure on me and makes me less likely to want to participate. It's not like I have this kinky fantasy I am just keeping to myself. I would rather he just kind of figure out "what to do," - he knows the positions I am most comfortable with / or I can give BJ, and I not have to be creative or come up with some way to talk dirty to him. I know it is depressing to him to think I am not "turned on" but until the past few generations, women were not expected to be as enthusiastic partners as they are now. Obviously things have gotten much better for women overall, but I do wish there wasn't that expectation that we be as "into" sex as men. [/quote]

I have orgasms and consider myself moderately high libido, but this drives me crazy too.  I don’t watch porn.  I don’t think a lot about sex with DH when we aren’t having it.  [/quote]

Part of the problem is the somewhat frequent insistence that "women are just as sexual as men." On average, they just ... aren't. I understand the assertion comes from a good place: women should have the right to just as much sexual agency as men. Culturally, women have been pressured into hiding their sexuality, and that should stop. But I think it's also fair to acknowledge that, by and large, women aren't as horny or preoccupied with sex as men are (on average). [/quote]

That’s a really good point. [/quote]

It is. but I would argue - denying that women may really enjoy sex but at a lower frequency IS also hiding their sexuality. I love s*x but want to have it once a week with a partner. Not three times. but this seems taboo to say - I like sex a lot, but not 5x/week. [/quote]

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